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Heroin Monkey
1 year ago
The image shows a fighter jet, an F/A-18 Hornet, on the deck of an aircraft carrier. A person in yellow directing gear, likely a plane director or 'shooter', is visible in the foreground, guiding the aircraft. The text overlay reads, 'The 6 year old at Walmart directing his morbidly obese mother while she parks her mobility scooter.'
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image is a three-panel meme. The top panel shows an anime character with pink hair and heart graphics around her. The text says 'She protecc'. The middle panel shows the same character with her fist up ready to strike. The text says 'She attacc'. The bottom panel shows Formula 1 driver Max Verstappen in his racing suit and the text says 'But most importantly, max verstappen'.
  • 0
  • shaylie lol
    1 year ago
    A doll in a pink box looks as if she's just realized she farted. The image contains the text: "She looks like she farted in the box and it finally hit her."
  • 2
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    An image depicts three children sitting around a table that's covered with various pills. The text above them reads: "grandma is dead so lets eat all of her pills". One of the children also has a text bubble saying: "She Won't Be Needing Those Anymore!"
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image shows two panels. The first one shows an older man with a long white beard, presumably Noah, looking somewhat confused, with the text "Noah?" underneath. The second panel shows Noah with a glowing effect, as if illuminated from within, with the text "Get the boat." underneath. Above these two panels is the text: "A friend got mad at me for smelling his sister's underwear. I don't know if it was because she was still wearing them or because the rest of the family was there. Either way it made the rest of the funeral very awkward."
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A Twitter post with the text "I squeeze my girl when she on her period cause she my Lil ketchup packet" above an image of two men. The bottom image has the text "My FBI agents" over it.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A tweet by Sarah Cooper says: Titanic (1997). Scientist: Where's the diamond? Old lady: *three hour long story about how she lost her virginity*
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    1) buy a lobster
[deleted] by
My friend is in forensics and works on crime
scenes. They find a woman laying on the
bathroom floor with a head wound and live
baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
residue. After 3 days of investigation, they
figured out what happened.
Long story short, she bought a lobster from
the market. In the market, they feed the
lobster live baby shrimp until they're sold. This
woman brings the lobster home, inserts the
lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a lighter
and puts the flame towards the lobster's head,
so the lobster will frantically start shaking his
tail (which is inside her vagina), giving her the
jollies. Apparently she killed the lobster from
burning his head too long, the lobster, being
dead, voids his bowels, causing this lobster to
shit live baby shrimp into her vagina. This
woman then goes to pee and sees live baby
shrimp crawling out of her vagina, she freaks
out, falls, and cracks her head open on the
bathtub and dies.
it happened in Chicago in 2001
?
---
14
1) wait for horny
Chicago 2001
"Lobster Love" Incident
  • 0
  • Bluntlord
    1 year ago

    2024

    The image shows a split view of the same person. On the left, they have shorter hair, makeup and wear a green t-shirt, with the text "What are your Pronouns?" written in yellow. On the right, they are shirtless with facial hair, and text in purple that says "I'm a She/Them Titties".
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A man, Jeffrey Epstein, smiles at the viewer. In the background are two women. The text overlay says: "I asked Hillary to be my valentines, but she left me hanging."
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image is a screenshot of a 4chan post with green text on a black background. It depicts a dystopian scenario in a future where Hillary Clinton has become a supreme ruler and implemented a series of drastic measures.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image displays a text that says "Boomer ladies: Hahah minion memes. Millennial girls: oh no, Donald Trump racist. 14 y.o girls:". Below there is an image of a girl with superimposed text that reads "SHE SHITS HERSELF".
  • 0
  • trixiedixie🄰
    1 year ago
    An image of a Hello Kitty figurine with red eyes and a blood-splattered knife. The text overlay reads: "In the day, she likes Hello Kitty. At night she drops the 'O'."
  • 1
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image shows text in white font on a grey background. It reads: "If a woman is uncomfortable watching you masturbate, she: A. Has intimacy issues. B. Is frigid. C. Needs to sit somewhere else on the bus."
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image shows a picture of Jeffrey Epstein with the text 'I asked Hillary to be my Valentine' at the top and 'She left me hanging' at the bottom.
  • 0
  • Chunke Monke
    1 year ago

    it all makes sense now 😮😮😮

    The image has the title "Cooties" followed by a definition. "Diseases that the opposite sex has that gives you a reason to not be around them. When you get older, cooties becomes known as 'STDs.'" It then gives two examples: "Age 8: 'Ewww... She has cooties, I can't talk to her!'" and "Age 15: 'Ewww... She has herpes, I can't sleep with her!'"
  • 1
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A painting of Jesus with a ray of light coming from him towards a woman kneeling before him. The text says: "JESUS. Ray that turns you into French for your sins. Woman crying because she doesn't want to be French."
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image shows a green cartoon character with red eyes. Below the image is text of a story about a date gone wrong, ending with the line "That's my story of how I got cockblocked by motherfucking al qaeda."
  • 0
  • Yuri
    1 year ago

    sad

    An image of the character Bonnie from Five Nights at Freddy's, looking sad with a cigarette in his mouth. The text on the image reads: "She was my chica until I found out she spent 5 nights at Freddy's."
  • 1
  • Wade
    2 years ago
    The image shows a series of posts. The first post asks, "Remember in college you were making out with Betty from your CompSci class and she put a finger up your butt. So you started questioning your sexual preference?" with a reply, "IT WAS MY FINGER BARRY!". The second post starts with, "Remember when you were jacking off with no clothes on for the first time just to try it out? Remember when your Mom walked by and saw everything, even though you were sure that you had closed the door?" followed by the reply, "It was me, Barry! I opened the door! And don't think for a moment that I didn't see everything too!!". The third post reads, "Remember that wet dream that ruined your favorite cartoon bed spread as a teen?!" with the reply "IT WAS ME, BARRY! I JERKED YOU OFF IN YOUR SLEEP!!"
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