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Sooploosh MacSchnibble
1 year ago

Jorking my peniys

The image is a screenshot of a tweet by user @Xvstardust_. The tweet text reads: One time I was jorking mine peniys and... Well... Let's just say it got hard...
  • 0
  • Thoughtless
    1 year ago

    experiment

    The post is a text-based message with several paragraphs detailing a hypothetical scenario involving gorillas and drugs in a shopping mall.
  • 1
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image shows the development of a person through four stages of life. In the first picture, the figure is an old man with a hat standing next to a door, the second picture is a man sitting on a chair with a question mark, and the third picture is a man kneeling with a stressed expression, the last picture is a boy drawing on an easel. The text "It starts with" is at the top.  The text "one thing" is near the beginning. The text "I don't know why" is above the next picture. The text "It doesn't even matter how hard you try" is above the last picture.
  • 2
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A black and white photo of soldiers landing on a beach from a boat. In the middle of the photo is the cartoon character Chris McLean with his arms spread out in a welcoming manner. The text on the image reads, "Alright campers, today's challenge is gonna be a hard one."
  • 1
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image shows a comparison of the number of episodes of two TV series. At the top, there is the Sesame Street logo with the text "4,561 episodes" below it, placed next to a large figure. Below it, there is a smaller figure with the One Piece logo and "1085 episodes".
  • 1
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image shows a text list titled 'Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator'. The list provides humorous and absurd actions to perform inside an elevator.
  • 1
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A list of ten things to do in an elevator. The text reads: Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator. 1. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 2. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?" 3. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!" 4. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking. 5. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on". 6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly. 7. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. 8. Dress up as the devil and then ask other people as they get in, "Going down?" 9. Drag a desk into the elevator. Ask "Do you have an appointment?" 10. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."
  • 1
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image contains five Yu-Gi-Oh! trading cards. Four of them are labeled 'Right Arm of the Forbidden One', 'Left Arm of the Forbidden One', 'Right Leg of the Forbidden One', and 'Left Leg of the Forbidden One' respectively. They feature golden limbs of a figure in chains. The fifth card in the center is labeled 'Nick Vujcic' and shows a picture of a man with no limbs.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image shows three panels. The first panel has a picture of a person with the text "Me" below it. The second panel has text that reads "Not knowing what the plastic tube on the end of a shoelace is" and shows some other people in the background. The third panel has another person with text below it reading "That one Phineas & Ferb episode".
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago

    shoutout to yugoslavia gotta be one of my favorite genders

    A photo shows a crowd of people holding up various flags, including a Yugoslavian flag, several rainbow flags, and a bi flag. The flags are waving against a backdrop of trees.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    The image is a comic strip with 6 panels. The first panel shows a man standing in a kitchen. The second panel shows the man about to crack an egg in a bowl. In the third panel a chicken pops out of the egg with a cracking sound and flames next to the man's face. In the fourth panel the chicken thanks the man for freeing it and says it will grant him a wish, showing the man a little surprised. In the fifth panel the man makes the wish that he wants an omelette. In the last panel, the man looks exasperated as the chicken looks at him next to the omelette in the pan.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A dog is on top of a raw turkey in a roasting pan. The image is a screenshot of a text message conversation. The first message says "OMG GET DOWN HERE! THOR GOT THE TURKEY!! HE'S HUMPING IT AND SNARLING AT EVERYONE!!!". The second says "My baby's in love!". The third message says "MOM NOT FUNNY! What are we going to do?? We have people to feed!". The last message says "Oh relax, we'll just wash it off and cook it. No one will know."
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A text message exchange shows a request to buy a card because a coworker's husband was deported. The image below the message shows a greeting card that says "Adios!" with an image of a chihuahua wearing a sombrero. The second text message below the card says "what the fuck is wrong with you?"
  • 0
  • 𝐋
    Lostin Flowers
    1 year ago

    Now that's the piece I'm missing!

    The image shows a figure with a jigsaw puzzle pattern over it. There is one missing piece in the head area. A hand is holding up the last puzzle piece, which is labeled 'ONE BILLION DOLLARS'. The text on the image says 'Sometimes all a person needs is that one missing piece'.
  • 1
  • mike69
    1 year ago

    name it

    The image shows Freddy Fazbear's head in a dark setting, with part of the head in shadow. The text says, "Say one thing only FNAF fans will understand."
  • 8
  • Ξ±my
    1 year ago

    charmin bear pearly harbor?

    The image shows a phone screen displaying a video and underneath comments. The text on top reads, "and the bear is like:". The comments mention, "in one of the commercials they show a bear TSA which implies that there was a Charmin bear 9/11." Another comment says, "Ain't no way" and a final comment asks "was there also a Charmin bear Hitler?"
  • 2
  • Wade
    1 year ago
    A four-panel comic strip. In the first panel, a figure says, "Sometimes I feel like I have no one to turn to". The second panel shows a figure with a mustache saying "That's not true! Your mother and I are always here." In the third panel, another figure with blonde hair confirms, "Your father's right! You can count on us!". The fourth panel shows the first figure looking into two mirrors, one showing the mother and one showing the father. The first figure says "Ahhh- Almost had it that time!".
  • 1
  • Wade
    1 year ago

    Based Shadow

    The image shows a tweet by user amyroses saying "don't break peoples hearts! they only have one :(". Below that, user shadow replied saying "yeah break their bones, they have 206."
  • 7
  • Mafuyu Asahina
    1 year ago

    Sayori moment

    The image features a light pink background with white text that reads "don't be shocked if one day I just...". There is a full body anime illustration of Sayori from Doki Doki Literature Club, who is a female character with a pink bow, brown hair, and a school uniform. She is depicted with her hands out and smiling.
  • 0
  • The Unknown King of Moderation
    1 year ago
    The image shows two sides of a text message conversation between two people, with the text "No one: 11 yr old relationships:" above them.
  • 20
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