Imagine the only way you can get laid is if you force it. 😂 Loser!
"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? You're adopted. Haley says she likes me more than you."
Me: Would you like to be the sun in my life?
Her: Awww... Yes!!!
Me: Good, then stay 92.96 million miles away from me.
Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
A. Ask your mother.
Yo, sis, come here.
Sis: What?
Me: Oh, sorry, you doing school?
Sis: Yup.
Me: Can I go?
Sis: No way, you're going to hug me.
Me: I love you.
I don't know why my boyfriend's dad doesn't like me. Maybe because we had sex?
A man was asked by his 21 years old daughter, "Dad, how do you give a blowjob to a man that has a big dick?"
Her father replied, "Honey, you should have watched me last night. It was inside my mouth. Does it cycle now?"
Student: Why does everyone hate me?
Another student: Because U got the A last night.
A man told his love interest she looked beautiful.
And then his love interest told him she had loads of things to tell him.
And after 3 minutes, she told him he looked fat, ugly, disgusting, creepy, and tiny.
Then the police came and arrested her for saying that.
Shaenaya hates me, help! And she wants to suck off ******* and ****** and ***** and *****.
My roommate's diary says I have boundary issues.