Heart Disease jokes

Donald Trump

What did Melania ever see in Donald Trump?

$2 billion and high cholesterol.

One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully off him. The cop then asked the bully, "Why are you beating him up?" I responded, saying, "I'm fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease." Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, "Well, how did I do?"

Number

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Let me know what your results are!

The image shows four circles with different patterns and numbers inside. The first one is blue-ish with the number 12. It indicates kidney disease. The second one is orange with the number 15 and corresponds to lung cancer. The third one is yellow with no discernible number suggesting a brain tumor. The last one is black with the number 28, indicating heart disease.

Heart Disease memes

Grandfather

Punk · 8 years ago

My grandfather has the heart of a lion... And a lifetime ban from the zoo.

Heart

ShiftyDealer69 · 6 years ago

Man: What's up?

Me: I'm annoyed.

Man: Why?

Me: I stole my gf's heart.

Man: So why are you annoyed?

Me: Everyone else in the surgery room gave me weird looks.

Heartbeat

Mr. Depression · 5 years ago

What is the easiest line to draw in the hospital?

My heartbeat.

Man

NeoNazz93 · 8 years ago

A man goes for his annual checkup. Afterward, he's sitting in the doctor's office, and the doctor comes in with the results of his tests. The doctor says, "I have some bad news; you have cancer and Alzheimer's." The man replies, "Well, at least I don't have cancer."