Puns

puppy

I named my dog 5-Miles so now I tell people I walk 5-Miles everyday

Date

Anonymous

at a date : he: i work with animals everyday me: oh how sweet!what do you do? he:I’m a butcher

Depression

Anonymous

Lets make a joke on how depressing monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.

Puns

Potato with no excuses

What’s the city with the fastest growing population? Ireland cuz it’s Dublin everyday

Egg

Daniel King

How do chickens 🐔 get stronger and stronger?

They egg-cersize everyday!

Man

Kiwi

A person laughs everyday. “Man,” they say, "I’m glad I’m not an egg, otherwise I’d just CRACK MYseLf uP!

Politics

Myron R

I’ve two dogs and two cats, and they are all Democrats…they want a handout everyday

Drunk

This is a joke

What is it called when u whoop a donkey?

A whooped ass and apparently some people get that everyday from their drunk dads.

Kid

Stephanie

What brings kids to school everyday? A school bus 🚌

Paint

Anonymous

r u a toaster? cuz i wanna take a bath wit u r u a knife? cuz u make me wanna kms r u a painting? cuz i hang u r u the flu? cuz u make me wanna hurl r u a newspaper? cuz u have new problems everyday r u the ground? cuz im six feet deep in u ;)

Singing

Anonymous

Yo mama so short she wakes up everyday in a brick house singing “Everything is Awesome”.

Morning

Anonymous

which freedom fighter do we say good morning everyday ans subah chandra bose subah means morning

Means

Honey boo boo

So I made a simple cancer joke on roblox with my friend an then both hers dumb ass friends we’re like, OMG WHY WOULD U SAY DAT? YOUR HORRIBLE!! THAT PISSED ME OFF like damn woman it’s not like I said, IF PEOPLE IN YOUR FAMILY DIED FROM CANCER THAT MEANS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ARE ALL DUMB ASSES. If anything they are actually dumb asses but hey. Also they can’t talk. They don’t know that I’m abused everyday at home and pressured to get good grades or else I’d get my head bashed against a wall till there is blood. So if they are reading this, SUCK MY ASS BITCH

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