DoS jokes
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
What do you call a Punjabi that’s drowning? Mandeep.
Abraham Lincoln was a good man, he jumped out the window with his dick in his hand and walked up to a group of ladies and said I'm doing my duty so why don't you give me some booty?
What do you call the White House when a woman becomes President? A stable.
What do apples and depressed kids have in common?
They both hang on trees.
Do you know what a reverse exorcism is?
It's when the demon tells the priest to exit the child's body.
How do you tell a male skeleton from a female skeleton by the BONERS lmao?
There was a man named Matt that went to the church to confess one of his most recent sins. He told the priest, "I am here to tell you my sins." He was all for it and said, "Go ahead."
Matt, "Father, last night I almost cheated on my wife."
Priest, "How so?"
Matt, "We were together naked, but we didn't do anything, just rubbed each other, that's all."
Priest, "RUBBING TOGETHER IS THE SAME THING AS PUTTING IT IN! For your sins you must never see that woman again and put $50 in the donation box!"
Matt, "Okay, I promise not to see her again."
Then Matt walks out the door.
Priest, "Hey! I saw you! You didn't put any money in the donation box!!"
Matt, "Yes I did. I took the money and rubbed it against the box because you said rubbing it is the same thing as putting it in."
Why do trees never call emo kids?
The emos always hang up on them.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
Do you know the TV show "Naked and Afraid?" Well, that's what my grandpa and I played when I was young.
Why can an orphan not do school work?
Because they have to take their work home to their parents.
Gina: Ha! YOU HAVE NOTHING!
Orphan: Yes I do.
Gina: What do you have then?
Orphan: Parents.
Gina: LIAR!
What do you call an orphan taking a picture?
A family portrait.
What do you call a man who offended an NFL player...
Odin Floyd.
If you punch an orphan, what are they going to do, tell their parents?
If you punch an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
How do skeletons get COVID?
From the coffin!
Why do skeletons like having sex with short girls before eating?
They like to bone a petite.
What do you call a Chinese rich man? Cha-ching!