What do you call dead?
(Not Michael Jackson)
DoS Jokes
What do you call an emo committing suicide while filming it?
America's Funniest Home Videos.
Why do Indians have a red dot on their head?
Because they're recording.
Why do orphans cry at insurance places?
They got offered the family plan.
Did you know that..
Studies show 9 in 10 Americans do not have basic math skills.
Oh, thank god I'm in that 1%.
What kind of punch do little kids give to other little kids? The Sandy Hook.
How do necrophiles get consent? A ouija board.
What do you call a girl above age 16 who says she is a virgin? A liar.
Hello, This is Jimmy from Jimmy's Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic! Your next loss is our next sauce! How many pizzas do you need?
What do you call a duck that can fix anything? Duck tape.
Do you know pigeons die when they have sex?
I mean, the one I fucked died.
I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!
Why do orphans play Sims?
Because they can make themselves a family.
Why do orphans get in trouble at school?
Because the school doesn't have any parents to report to.
If WW3 starts, I do, in fact, belong in the kitchen.
What game do Emos play?
Fruit Ninja.
(Sorryyyyy Lmaoooo)
The police: Pull over!
The kid: Do you know who my dad is?
The police: What, your mom did not tell you?
Why can an orphan not have homework? They do not have a home.
If someone who speaks two languages is bilingual, and someone who speaks many languages is multilingual, then what do you call someone who speaks one language?
An American.
I decided that I'll end it all, but when I drove off, I remembered I forgot to do the dishes.
