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GENESIS 37 Joseph’s Dreams 1Jacob lived in the land of his father’s sojournings, in the land of Canaan. 2These are the generations of Jacob. Joseph, being seventeen years old, was pasturing the flock with his brothers. He was a boy with the sons of Bilhah and Zilpah, his father’s wives. And Joseph brought a bad report of them to their father. 3Now Israel loved Joseph more than any other of his sons, because he was th… Read more
GENESIS 35 God Blesses and Renames Jacob 1God said to Jacob, “Arise, go up to Bethel and dwell there. Make an altar there to the God who appeared to you when you fled from your brother Esau.” 2So Jacob said to his household and to all who were with him, “Put away the foreign gods that are among you and purify yourselves and change your garments. 3Then let us arise and go up to Bethel, so that I may make there an alta… Read more
GENESIS 32 Jacob Prepares to Meet Esau 1Jacob also went on his way, and the angels of God met him. 2When Jacob saw them, he said, “This is the camp of God!” So he named that place Mahanaim. 3Jacob sent messengers ahead of him to his brother Esau in the land of Seir, the country of Edom. 4He instructed them: “This is what you are to say to my lord Esau: ‘Your servant Jacob says, I have been staying with Laban and hav… Read more
GENESIS 31 Jacob Flees From Laban 1Jacob heard that Laban’s sons were saying, “Jacob has taken everything our father owned and has gained all this wealth from what belonged to our father.” 2And Jacob noticed that Laban’s attitude toward him was not what it had been. 3Then the Lord said to Jacob, “Go back to the land of your fathers and to your relatives, and I will be with you.” 4So Jacob sent word to Rachel and Leah… Read more
GENESIS 30 1When Rachel saw that she was not bearing Jacob any children, she became jealous of her sister. So she said to Jacob, “Give me children, or I’ll die!” 2Jacob became angry with her and said, “Am I in the place of God, who has kept you from having children?” 3Then she said, “Here is Bilhah, my servant. Sleep with her so that she can bear children for me and I too can build a family through her.” 4So she gave… Read more
GENESIS 29 Jacob Arrives in Paddan Aram 1Then Jacob continued on his journey and came to the land of the eastern peoples. 2There he saw a well in the open country, with three flocks of sheep lying near it because the flocks were watered from that well. The stone over the mouth of the well was large. 3When all the flocks were gathered there, the shepherds would roll the stone away from the well’s mouth and water the s… Read more
I thought there was an edit option for your own posts i was just about to fix a spelling error in one of my jokes and the only option that pooed up was share link
Lovely Perv, yesterday, I was talking about this guy:
https://worstjokesever.com/jokes/6190b402e5afc57eb947be47/wow-my-own-joke-category-i-problem-wont-remember-this
GENESIS 25 The Death of Abraham 1Abraham had taken another wife, whose name was Keturah. 2She bore him Zimran, Jokshan, Medan, Midian, Ishbak and Shuah. 3Jokshan was the father of Sheba and Dedan; the descendants of Dedan were the Ashurites, the Letushites and the Leummites. 4The sons of Midian were Ephah, Epher, Hanok, Abida and Eldaah. All these were descendants of Keturah. 5Abraham left everything he owned to Isaa… Read more
GENESIS 24 Isaac and Rebekah 1Abraham was now very old, and the Lord had blessed him in every way. 2He said to the senior servant in his household, the one in charge of all that he had, “Put your hand under my thigh. 3I want you to swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and the God of earth, that you will not get a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I am living, 4but will go to my country … Read more
GENESIS 15 The Lord’s Covenant With Abram 1After this, the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision: “Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward.” 2But Abram said, “Sovereign Lord, what can you give me since I remain childless and the one who will inherit my estate is Eliezer of Damascus?” 3And Abram said, “You have given me no children; so a servant in my household will be my heir.” 4Then th… Read more
You're so fat that when you got on the scales they said "I need your weight not your phone number" You're so fat that an oragami crane has less folds than you. You are so fat that when you wear a yellow raincoat people shout out "taxi" You're so fat, the photo I took of you last christmas is still printing.
You're so fat that when you want to iron your pants, you have to go out to your driveway. … Read more
GENESIS 10 The Table of Nations 1This is the account of Shem, Ham and Japheth, Noah’s sons, who themselves had sons after the flood. The Japhethites 2The sons of Japheth: Gomer, Magog, Madai, Javan, Tubal, Meshek and Tiras. 3The sons of Gomer: Ashkenaz, Riphath and Togarmah. 4The sons of Javan: Elishah, Tarshish, the Kittites and the Rodanites. 5(From these the maritime peoples spread out into their territories by th… Read more
Hey im, sorta new here- so can I ask a question?: Why is it so toxic here? People are entitled to their owns opinions about things and it is better to keep your trap shut than to cause drama.
No offense do be all "WeLL aCtuALLy-" I dont want any of that shit today^^
Sheesh, everyone here talks big, but they just can't shut up about their own problems, especally anon the executour, you literally are the stupidest perosn on here
GENESIS 5 From Adam to Noah 1This is the written account of Adam’s family line. When God created mankind, he made them in the likeness of God. 2He created them male and female and blessed them. And he named them “Mankind” when they were created. 3When Adam had lived 130 years, he had a son in his own likeness, in his own image; and he named him Seth. 4After Seth was born, Adam lived 800 years and had other sons and d… Read more
Hey everyone! I wanted to thank you for 17 followers! You all make my day so much brighter <3. Here are some more things you can do with emotions!
Anxiety, Challenge yourself to talk. Grab a teddy or something you know you can talk to, and start talking to it and try to forget your anxiety.
Remember that you are not your anxiety. You are not weak. You are not inferior. You have a mental health condition. It’s calle… Read more
I love how on tiktok all the different horoscopes have their own hairstyles. well... not cancer
To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewers head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they… Read more
Holy shit, stop the bullshit. Stop commenting shit and leave each other alone. Mind your own shit.