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Guys, for whatever reason, please do NOT use fly trap paper to wax your asshole!!!

Today, I was trying to search around my house for some waxing paper because my intertwined lengthy asshole hairs created a humid environment to where sweat and fungus was able to be produced. Then, I looked in my father's garage and I was able to find a large sheet of waxing paper (or so I thought).

The waxing paper was yellow for wh… Read more

Scripts.com Bee Movie By Jerry Seinfeld

NARRATOR: (Black screen with text; The sound of buzzing bees can be heard) According to all known laws of aviation, : there is no way a bee should be able to fly. : Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. : The bee, of course, flies anyway : because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. BARRY BENSON: (Barry is picking out a shirt) Yell… Read more

I get it. You hated him 4 years ago and you still do today

I have seen a lot hate and vitriol thrown his way, but the guy is an overachiever and defies the odds.

Perhaps it is jealousy and people can't stand the thought of how much money and success he has.

Yeah, it may be true that he has had his fair share of scandals. He may have told a few lies here and there and twisted the truth to make himself look better. … Read more

My dearest friends and family, after seventeen years I have decided that instead of continuing to suffer in the disgusting place that is called “earth,” I have decided that Hell would suit me better. Yes, I didn’t say heaven, and that is because I have done nothing but sinned my way through life and I’m sorry. I’m sorry for rejecting help. I’m sorry for pushing you all to the sides and obsessing over myself. The only… Read more

These fucking anons have got to stop. Eloise isn’t real, whoever that is you’re a fucking weirdo bitch. Also whoever is that anon that talks about Amy and Madi and makes excess posts just hop off everyone’s dick and leave it’s so tiring 😭😭😭 istfg i wanna kms every time i see your dumbass posts.

Hear ye, hear ye. You guys need to know some stuff about some of your friends on here!! YIKES. Make sure you know people.

Hi. I'm Eloise. Jake and I have been together for 3 years and I am so tired of hearing about all of you hoes from people in my school. Amy and Madi, whoever you guys are, you're so lame. Someone posted your pics on ista....you guys are ugly lol nothing on me. Jake told me not to say anything but honestly this is stupid. If he wants to break up with me over this, I dont care. I'm too pretty to care. My hair isn't frizzy and I'm not fat. I also dont' need extra make up like madi or super tight clothes like amy. Yikes.

Jo Ethan, how do u make those edits? I also wanna edit things...Like movies and stuff. How do ppl edit something

I think it’s time an important chapter of my life came to an end, worst jokes ever. I have enjoyed my time on here. I learned some new words on here, and I am no longer a silly delulu guy. I have matured because of this site, surprisingly. I take things seriously, and i enjoy life more. Well when I’m on here, not IRL. This site has not made my mental health any better. Acutally, it made it worse. From january until n… Read more

Ethan if you make Kayla and Eli mod I’m gonna leave the site. You’re so fucking bad at making desicions.

Alright FOR STARTERS, let me explain and tell everyone the truth here about me and Jake breaking up. I'll confirm what’s fake and what's not, starting with the first rumor. The rumors about me and Jake breaking up are true. We broke up about a month ago, due to personal reasons that were going on with Jake and slowly drifting apart. The reason I didn't tell anyone about me and him not being together anymore, was be… Read more

well shit, I ain't gonna kms (seriously), but I don't know what to do with myself anymore I barely have any good irl friends anymore I might get pulled out of my school I'm scared of losing the friends I have I'm lying to my parents and destroyed their trust in me I'm angering so many of the people that I care about here I feel like I'm losing people left and right I want to make everyone around me happy, but I keep forgetting myself. My mental health is going horribly Just fuck it idk anymore I'm just so scared of the way people are attacking me. fuck fuck fuck fuck anyway see yall

I am not okay I am loosing sleep at night loosing track of days all i wanna do is stay in bed and sleep and let the devil take me there is no other side i am too fat (according to my gramma) i cant take the hate i get i am holding on to dear life god knows when its all said and then hes gonna make me go to heaven right?

Dear @matt Incase you have not noticed I recently started a very narcissistic dictatororal cult called Blach Man Cult. To join you must contact me and I'll gove you pfp to use.

But I've went out of my way to make you one before you even ask.

So here you go, my child. It's in the comments and I'd love to see it in action soon.

Love, Your lord and saviour

Ok, I need to make some things straight. This site has gone into chaos because of this stupid stuff that’s been going on, so right now I’m only gonna tell the facts. No stupid false stuff, no fluff, nothing. You guys need to understand what happened. A week ago, I attempted scuicide by overdose via Benadryl and a mix of other random opioids. This was around 7:55 AM EST. I passed out, making a big banging sound, awak… Read more

I'll take a Double Triple Bossy Deluxe, on a raft, four-by-four animal-style, extra shingles with a shimmy and a squeeze, light axle grease, make it cry, burn it, and let it swim.