Child protection jokes

Apparently, as a 4-year-old, Hitler was saved from drowning in the river Passau by a local priest.

Goes to show once more that a lot of problems would be solved if priests could just keep their hands off kids.

He is looking for children. If you don't know who EDP445 is, look him up.

Be careful around EDP445.

Why can't Michael Jackson go within 500m of a school zone?

Because he's dead.

Do you know why pedos get away with molesting orphans? Who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.

What do pedophiles do when they wake up?

Turn on the child safety lock on the car.

Kid's uncle: "Your mum said you can have your friends round tonight! But I'm gonna have to baby sit today."

Kid: "OK THANK YOU."

(AT BED TIME)

Kid: "Please may you stop touching my leg BEN!"

Ben: "I'm not."

(Turns light on) Kid: "UNCLEEEEE STOP SPILLING MILK OVER ME!!!"

You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?

Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed,

One fell off and bumped his head.

The momma called the doctor and the doctor said...

“We’re calling Child Protective Services.”