Bord jokes

Me, calls the police*

Me: Hey, I'm gonna commit suicide!

Cop on the phone: Please wait till we get there.

Me: Why, so you can then stop me?

Cop on the phone: No, we just want a murder, not a suicidal report on your paper... and we are all bored!

Me: Ok, my house number is *********************, ok!

Cop on the phone: Awesome! Just a sec. *whispers* Guys, I finally found someone who wants to get killed!

If you're ever bored, kick an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

Why is Ollie so boring? He plays board games.

Go to community, I'm bored.

Brojobs are like air. It's not important until you don't have any.

Why do Mexicans always cross the border in twos?

Because the sign says "No Tres passing."

A German went to France for a holiday, and here is the scene. French border staff asked, "Occupation?" The German replied, "No, no, no, just visiting."

What’s the German word for BRA? Keep two from floppin'.

What is the difference between the rook and the bishop? The rook goes straight, while the bishop moves diagonally.