Wife: "Honey? What do you think about my teeth?"
Husband: "They remind me of stars... yellow and far apart."
GG Miller
@ggmiller
If you're that depressed, reach out to someone. And remember, suicide is a permanent solution.
She's so ugly, she has to sneak up on a mirror.
Do you wanna lose ten pounds of ugly fat? Cut off your head.
You're so ugly that when you were born, the doctor threw you out the window, and the window threw you back.
You are so ugly, when you looked in the mirror your reflection walked away.
I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
Beauty is only skin deep... but ugly goes all the way to the bone!
Whenever someone calls me ugly, I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.
Yo momma is so fat, her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before she does.
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.
Yo momma is so fat, when she sat on Walmart, she lowered the prices.
Yo mamma is so ugly when she tried to join an ugly contest they said, "Sorry, no professionals."
Yo mama so fat, when she got on the scale it said, “I need your weight, not your phone number.”
Yo mama's so fat that even Dora don't have time to explore her!
Handicapped jokes are so cruel.
I can't stand them!
I always park in handicapped spaces at the hospital.
Just to test their patients.
What did the blind, deaf, mentally handicapped orphan get for Christmas?
Cancer.
Why are handicap signs blue?
Because they're all Crips.
Yo mama so dumb, she went to the eye doctor to get an iPhone.
Yo mama's teeth so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter!