How do you know when Helen Keller is home?
Answer: When you hear somebody falling down the stairs!
Chuck Glisson
Question: Why did Donald Trump convert to Judaism?
Answer: Because he heard that Vladimir Putin likes to drink vodka with "Orange Jews"!
What is 80 feet wide and has 22 teeth?
Answer: The front row of a Trump Rally!
What is Vladimir Putin's favorite song?
Answer: Crimea River!
Why was Helen Keller truly an inspiration?
She learned how to read and write despite being from Alabama!
Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks fruit punch is a gay boxer!
What is a redneck virgin?
Answer: A seven-year-old that can run faster than her brothers!
Why do all of Oliver Anthony's songs sound like "shit"?
Answer: Because he sucks!
Why does the wind always blow from the "West" in Washington State?
Answer: Because IDAHO SUCKS!
Question: Did you know that "diarrhea" is hereditary?
Answer: It "runs" in your jeans!
Did you hear about the "Funny Doctor"?
He'll have you in "Stitches"!
Question: Why was "6" scared?
Answer: Because "7" ate "9"!
What do you call an Argentinian with a rubber toe?
Roberto!
Why couldn't Jesus have been born in Florida?
Answer: They wouldn't be able to find "Three Wise Men" or a virgin!
What does a "Smart Russian" and a "Unicorn" have in common?
Answer: Non-existence!
What is the definition of "Endless Love"?
Answer: Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder playing "Tennis"!
Why are "Redneck" murder cases the HARDEST to solve?
Answer: Because ALL the DNA "Matches", and there are NO "Dental Records".
How do you keep an idiot in suspense?
I'll tell you tomorrow!
Why did the idiot post so many 9/11 jokes?
Answer: Because his mom is a whore!
Did you hear about the guy that posts all of the "Hairline Jokes"?
Answer: Yeah, he's a COMPLETE IDIOT!