Cal3y

My child: "Dad, am I beautiful?"

Me: "You’re like the sun, sweetie. You’re painful to look at."

Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"

1 like= 1 more child in my basement

I have no father or no milk. Like if you relate.

The more suicidal people there are the less suicidal people there are

“I know that everyone is allowed to act stupid once in awhile, but you’re really abusing that privilege.”