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What are the differences between Santa and Joe Biden?

The kids actually want to sit on Santa’s lap.

Little Johnny got a train set for Christmas. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Alright, you motherfuckers get off here, and you motherfuckers get off here." His mom comes rushing in and says, "Little Johnny, we don’t use that kind of language, go to your room and think about what you did!"

After a few hours, she lets him out of his room. He goes back to play with his train set. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Okay, you guys get off here, and you guys get off here. And if you have any complaints about the two hour delay, take it up with the bitch in the kitchen."

  • 1

    • Gwen: Hi sir, how are you?

    Tj: Good... you?

    Gwen: I am super duper good! And where is your date? It seems like you need one 😉!

    Tj: 😏.

    Gwen: Here, this is your guest hall pass...you may...come in my friend!

    Tj: Thanks but um, don't you think you should be um getting inside too?

    Gwen: 🙁 No thanks sir but I have to work...I am the staff so bye! 😁.

    Tj: NO!!!!!!

    1 day later.

    Gwen: 🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕🤰🤰🤰👩‍👧‍👦

    "Hello, this is your captain speaking. We are flying at a level of 89 feet. If you look out of your window on the left, you will see the World Trade Center."

    A girl with no arms and one leg goes to her mother and asks: "Mom, next year for the carnival, can I dress up as a princess?"

    The mother replies: "Why? Didn't you like the ice lolly dress from last year?"

    My mom told me to unplug all the electronics, so I unplugged my grandma's life support.

    What's the difference between a school bus and a cactus?

    On a school bus, the pricks are on the inside.

    I know this isn't the real chicken wing song, but my version...

    "Chicken wing, chicken wing, I want your mommy. Slap her with my hairy salami while she's still yawning."

    Make your own chicken wing song and put it in the comments... :)

    There is a rich child and a poor child. The rich child invites the poor child to his house and shows him all the toys and tells him: "Look at what a beautiful radio-controlled airplane I have! You don't have it because you are poor!" The poor child answers: "You're right, it's very nice, but I have one thing that you don't have!" The rich child then invites him into the garden and shows him the swimming pool, the trampoline, and all the other games that can be done outdoors and says to the poor child: "Look at that beautiful swimming pool I have! It is very big; you don't have it because you are poor!" And the poor child says: "Beautiful, it is really beautiful! But one thing that you don't have." So the rich child feels bad. He says: "Wait, but I'm rich! How is it possible? I have everything I want because I'm rich. Why do you have something that I don't have?" And the poor child says: "I have cancer!"

  • 4

    • The definition of a stalker is two people going on a romantic walk, but only one person knows about it.

    Why did the orphan want to go to jail?

    So he could have a home and be cared for with food.

    An old lady was low on money because she had spent all of her money on clothes.

    So she decided to go to the bank. She walked up to the guy at the desk. She asked if he could check her balance. He asked a few questions to the old lady, like her weight and her height. He asked her if she had done any exercise recently. She was very confused. She got angry and asked the man again to check her balance. So he stood up, walked next to her and pushed her over. He came to the conclusion that she had a low balance.

    Neighbor 1: Knock knock.

    Neighbor 2: You forgot the 3rd knock.

    Odin: .....