Taxation jokes

Women are like the Twin Towers. After you smash them, and if some little people start jumping out, the government is gonna tax the shit outta you.

If prostitution had a tax-exempt status, and if an adult bookstore had a tax-exempt status because of a glory hole, churches would have to do something else to keep their tax-exempt status to avoid the risk of going out of business.

If the government can print money,

Then why are we paying taxes?

Don't steal. That's the government's job.

I hate these double standards.

If you burn a body at a crematorium you're "doing a good job". If you do it at home you're "destroying evidence".

I know I'm valuable, I come with a barcode ;)

Suicide is illegal because it's a crime to destroy government property.

Teacher: Kids, what does a chicken give you?

Students: Eggs.

Teacher: Very good. Now, what does the pig give you?

Kids: Bacon.

Teacher: Excellent. Now, what does the fat cow give you?

Kids: Homework.

In Soviet Russia, gay sex gets you arrested.

In America, getting arrested gets you gay sex.