Sleeper jokes

Someone asked me if I was a good sleeper. I told them I'm so good that I can do it with my eyes closed.

My girl is so cute when she sleeps. I watch her all the time... Tomorrow I might say hi to her for the first time.

I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he's a really deep sleeper.

I don't want to sleep like a baby. I want to sleep like my husband.

Sleep, but make it forever.

I did have a good night's sleep and a good day today, and tomorrow I have [planned] for a good night's sleep, and sleep with my...

Every time I come straight home from work, you're in the bed asleep and back there dead like a vampire in a casket.

Then the next thing I noticed, you just came back from the dead in no time, dummy.

I love going to sleep at night.