Screenplay jokes
Director: Hi, we are making a huge cliffhanger in this movie.
Actor: Really? What do I do?
Director: You will play the part of the cliff. (holds up hanging rope)
I'm writing a movie about 9/11. It's called "September 11th Two Thousand Fun."
I love how in horror movies the person calls out, "Hello," as if the psycho will answer, "Hey, what's up? I'm in the kitchen. Want a sandwich?"
I screamed "Jenga" today in class while watching a 9/11 documentary.
pilot: *over intercom* we're all going to die.
passengers: *start freaking out*
pilot: all of us will one day, no one knows when.
passengers: *sigh with relief*
pilot: but it'll probably be when we hit that mountain.
When the guy next to you says that he kind of agrees with the villain.
Me watching a World War 2 documentary.
Why does a movie set say "break a leg"? Because they have a cast.
Community talk
Scripts.com Bee Movie By Jerry Seinfeld
NARRATOR: (Black screen with text; The sound of buzzing bees can be heard) According to all known laws of aviation, : there is no way a bee should be able to fly. : Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. : The bee, of course, flies anyway : because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. BARRY BENSON: (Barry is picking out a shirt) Yell… Read more
SHREK
Written by
William Steig & Ted Elliott
SHREK Once upon a time there was a lovely princess. But she had an enchantment upon her of a fearful sort which could only be broken by love's first kiss. … Read more