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Sex

Anonymous · 2 years ago

I’m a professional 😉

A man is shown in five different panels. In the first panel, he is yelling: "WHY DID YOU HAVE SEX WITH HER?". The second panel shows another man, who responds: "SHE WAS LYING THERE NAKED, WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?!". In the third panel, the first man is yelling: "THE AUTOPSY, THE FUCKING AUTOPSY!". In the fourth panel, he is throwing a chair, and yelling: "DON'T TELL ME HOW TO DO MY JOB!". In the fifth panel, he is pointing and yelling: "YOU ARE THE WORST VET ON EARTH!"

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German

Erichh · 3 years ago

Sry but i had to do this

The image shows two panels. In the first panel, Winnie the Pooh is sitting in a chair looking snooty with the text "Could you please speak German?". In the second panel, Winnie the Pooh is wearing a tuxedo with a smug expression, and the text is "Sprich deutsch du Hurensohn!!!"

Tutorial

Nintendo Fan · 1 year ago

The image shows a split comparison. In the top half, a cruise ship is moving through calm water, and the text says, "Doing tutorial." In the bottom half, a person is struggling to stand on a paddleboard in the middle of the ocean, holding an umbrella for balance. The text above reads, "Whatever the fuck I'm trying to do on my own."

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Insult

Heroin Monkey · 11 months ago

A group of teenagers. In the foreground, a boy in a plaid shirt is pushing another boy in a blue shirt against a light-colored wall. The boy in blue has his head down and his face covered, appearing distressed. In the background, two girls are watching, one with a slight smile. Above them, text reads: "Tell your mom to do some more on her onlyfans."

Parent

✨Jassy✨ · 3 years ago

Me trying everyday

The image is divided into two panels. The left panel depicts two women, with one yelling aggressively and pointing. The right panel shows a white cat with tears in its eyes, sitting at a table with a plate of salad.

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Magic Trick

Angel_Izzy · 3 years ago

A young boy with a serious face. The text says: "When you tell your dad to do a magic trick and he disappears forever."

Yo mama

GG Miller · 3 years ago

SO @JusTlivInG wanted me to do some Yo Mamma Jokes

A person is pointing at the viewer with a surprised expression and the text "YO MAMA SO DAMN FAT. I PICTURED HER IN MY HEAD & THE BITCH BROKE MY NECK." is overlayed.

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Mama

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a search result page with the text "Did you mean: i'm a baby kitty where is mama?". Below this is an "AI Overview" section with the text "If you are a baby kitty and can't find your mama, try to stay calm and make soft meows to see if she can hear you. If you are alone, the best thing to do is wait,".

Turkey

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A dog is on top of a raw turkey in a roasting pan. The image is a screenshot of a text message conversation. The first message says "OMG GET DOWN HERE! THOR GOT THE TURKEY!! HE'S HUMPING IT AND SNARLING AT EVERYONE!!!". The second says "My baby's in love!". The third message says "MOM NOT FUNNY! What are we going to do?? We have people to feed!". The last message says "Oh relax, we'll just wash it off and cook it. No one will know."

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Loss

𝕱𝖗𝖚𝖎𝖙 𝖔𝖋 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝕰𝖑𝖊𝖒𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖘 · 3 years ago

saddest youtube comment :(

A text-based image displaying a story in a format similar to a forum post. It starts with the user detailing an event from when they were younger where their mom and sister had gone out to get groceries, and they were doing chores. While doing chores, they watched the news and saw a report of a local woman and daughter getting killed in a car accident. They then write about finding a note from their mom telling them they could play their game console before she came back. The post ends with them mentioning she never came home.

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Sexual Intercourse

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A chart divided into two columns: "Illegal" on the left with a pink header, and "Legal" on the right with a green header. The title above the chart is "Guide to animal rights" and the subtitle is "What to do and not to do with animals". Under "Illegal" are three illustrations with captions: 1) A person standing behind a cow, labeled "Sexual intercourse". 2) A person kneeling next to a pig lying on its side, labeled "Blowjob". 3) A chicken with straps and buckles on it, labeled "Bondage". Under "Legal" are three illustrations with captions: 1) A person standing behind a cow, using a tube, labeled "Insemination". 2) A person kneeling next to a small pig, holding an instrument, labeled "Castration without anaesthesia". 3) A grid representing a cage, labeled "Caging".

Die

Your local comrade · 2 years ago

I can now cross it off my bucket list

The image displays the text "Things I Want To Do Before I Die:".

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Insurance

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The image displays a screenshot from a video game featuring a menu with three options: "Give Up", "Try Again", and "Call Luigi". Text overlayed on the image reads: "POV: your insurance claim was denied by United Healthcare". Luigi is visible in the upper right corner of the image.

Water

jake · 2 years ago

A white dog with a slightly unnerving smile is in the middle of the image. The text above reads, "When someone is crying and you don't know what to do." The text below reads, "u want water?"

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Corner

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A list of ten things to do in an elevator. The text reads: Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator. 1. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 2. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?" 3. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!" 4. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking. 5. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on". 6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly. 7. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. 8. Dress up as the devil and then ask other people as they get in, "Going down?" 9. Drag a desk into the elevator. Ask "Do you have an appointment?" 10. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."

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Philosophy

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The image shows three speech bubbles. The top one, associated with a portrait of Socrates, reads "TO BE IS TO DO." The middle one, linked to a portrait of Kant, says "TO DO IS TO BE." The bottom one, paired with a picture of Scooby Doo, reads "DO BE DO BE DO."

Magic Trick

Angel_Izzy · 3 years ago

A close-up of a young boy with a serious facial expression. The text above reads "When you tell your dad to do a magic trick and he disappears forever."

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Tragedy

Kai :) · 3 years ago

omg im sobbing so hard, saddest yt comment ever bro, challenge, find a sadder one

A screenshot of a YouTube comment. It tells a story about a person whose mother and sister die in a car accident. After some time, they open their old PS2 and find a note from their mom stating that they can play after the chores are done. She also writes that she loves them. The commenter notes that the mother never came home and they never received their hugs and kisses.

Bob

blach66 · 3 years ago

A photo of a man in a suit with the text "HI I'M BOB" above his head and "MY FAVOURITE THING TO DO IS TO EAT 62-YEAR-OLD JANITORS" below him.

Weapon

Anonymous · 2 years ago

💡 idea. Start a confidential organization that only recruits via invite. Stockpile heavy duty weapons in an si when the time comes we can defend America from any domestic threat. *just a silly idea*

The image shows a painting of the founding fathers signing a document above a US flag, and an assault rifle. Text on the image reads: "2nd Amendment has nothing to do with hunting or home defense. It's about defending our freedom from oppressive government."

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