Diarrhoea jokes

What do you get if you cross diarrhea with incest?

I don't know.

Neither do I, but it runs in the family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had diarrhea.

What’s the difference between a microwave and a 10 year old girl?

The microwave doesn’t fart out blood and diarrhea when you pull your meat out.

Me: Ice woman diary: a witch's tin key.

Other: What? You said, "I swim in diarrhea, which is stinky?"

What do you call diarrhea from a hot woman? Chocolate milk.

What do you call diarrhea from a fat woman? Arsenic.

What is the worst combination of illnesses?

Alzheimer’s and diarrhea. You’re running but can’t remember where.

Surveys say that 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea. That means the 5th one likes it.

There's a movie about constipation. It hasn't come out yet.

A child has diarrhea and asked his mom for a Viagra. "Why in the world do you want that?" she asked him. He looks at her and says, "Well, that's what you gift dad when his shit won't get hard."

A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant.

After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!”

She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?”

To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”