A Personal Reflection on Love and Abandonment

if anyone cares litterally at all this is what I write in my phone so that nobody can find it. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do I fall in love if all that happens is they leave, everybody leaves they can never stay they never wanted to stay. I just use love or friendship as a way to be happy for tiny moments in my life because I never got that love as a child. My father left and that's proof nobody stays. I never see my mom. my stepdad and my mom is divorced when I thought I ACTUALLY had family. I love somebody BUT I know they'll probably leave in the end because who wants to stay? who wants to be around an annoying stupid bitch? nobody... they only time I'm nice is when Im happy for these micro times in my life. The cuts on my wrist, thighs and Ect? Their just a reminder how I can never get over how fuckig stupid I am.