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GENESIS 44 A Silver Cup in a Sack 1Now Joseph gave these instructions to the steward of his house: “Fill the men’s sacks with as much food as they can carry, and put each man’s silver in the mouth of his sack. 2Then put my cup, the silver one, in the mouth of the youngest one’s sack, along with the silver for his grain.” And he did as Joseph said. 3As morning dawned, the men were sent on their way with their donkeys.… Read more

Guys, i was just casually digging in my asshole, like any other human would, and i pulled out a condom, weird right?

My sister told me that my girlfriend was no good I asked why since she’s been over in are house she has been acting weird around my boyfriend I Asked isn’t you boyfriend in college I said my girlfriend is only in 7th grade I say he would be dating a minor. My sister said oh ya I was one telling you that because you girlfriend is just not good. I told good to slow with. Then I walked out of the room. True story

I wanna rip out my intestines throw them in sea, I want to raise some money to invest in plastic surgery. I want to cover myself head to toe and super sexy scars, cuz I mean aren't you supposed to burn if you're a star?

A man walks into a bar and orders three shots. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "Well... My oldest son just came out..." The man finishes the shots and leaves the bar. The next day, the man comes back and orders four shots. "What now?" the bartender asks. "My middle son just came out." The man finishes his drinks and leaves. He comes back the next day and orders five shots. "Again?" the bartender asks. "Yeah. My youngest son." He drinks his shots and leaves. The next day, he comes in again. This time, he orders ten shots. "My God! Is there anyone in your family that likes girls??" the bartender asks. "Yeah... My wife." (Repost!)

why this 5 year old giving out his mums credit card number. The kid is way to young to be on here

ADHD, can you help me out cos I feel like you'd know this kinda stuff?

Basically people in school keep calling each others Femboys, is that a tomgirl or something?

Random keyboard words made into sentences part 5:

In a few minutes, you should have an option of typing them out and typing in them into your computer screen. What you need to do is to type in the following commands to the command line, and then click on the command line to the right of the command. If you’re looking to create an application for a specific program. I have lost my faith in humanity.

Hey, people! My stepmother had been to the store with my baby brother today. She came home at 14:30 or something, (European time) she asked me to help her carry the groceries bags. [note: the bags are made out of plastic]

I did as I was asked for. The stairs I had to walk down has 18 steps. (yes, I count every step in a staircase when I walk in one.) The staircase ain’t very steep. The ninth step is big, you can f… Read more

I’m not funny! Please do not laugh at my jokes! But do check them out, they’re very unpredictable. Read them, do not laugh, they’re jokes, do not laugh at them!

Someone: hah- Me: NO DON’T YOU DARE!😠😠

mom tells her son to go to the other kid to walk to the kid just standing still to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car(but her son was blind the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap and the kid died because he couldn't hear he was deaf)

Poll

Is it possible to eat my spaghetti out of a cat bum bum or do I need you cut the cat in half?

None of you dimwits have anything left to say and I honestly don't blame anyone for leaving this website anymore. If you scroll through the chat all you will see is "Who's here??" and "Anyone on?" by the same 4 people. No one on this website is smart enough to maintain a simple human conversation, it all just feels fake or stolen. After being on this website for 6+ months, it appears that worstjokesever.com has been … Read more

My school gave out some ice cream and pop to the A and A/B students and we got recognition certificates.

Poll

Yall I'm scared af for tmr but I have a question I need to know bc I have my band concert tomorrow so help me out please