Coffee Bean jokes

What do you get when you cross a cow with a coffee bean grower?

De-calf!

I was making a coffee for my boss and this was the supposed recipe:

1 egg 1 tomato diced bell peppers a bag of sugar sea salt coffee beans rusted nails.

I got fired and spent the next 20 years in prison with a dude named Papa Bear.

I like my women like I like my coffee.

Dark, rich, and imported.

If you ever feel depressed, drink some coffee.

Expresso, expresso, no more depresso!

Why did the coffee file a police report? -- Because it was mugged.

How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank his coffee before it was cool.

Woman: "I want coffee, black."

Cop: *takes out gun* "WHERE?!"