People always tell me to say no to drugs, but if i'm talking to drugs, I probably said yes.
Chriss
Lost my other account, its chri5, back for vengance.
I'd like to have kids one day.
I don't think I could stand them any longer than that, though.
Wife: Honey, I’m pregnant. Husband: Hi Pregnant, I’m dad. Wife: No, you’re not.
Genie: You cannot wish for more wishes, immortality, or love.
Man: I wish not to die a virgin.
Genie: I just said no wishing for immortality!
There’s a lot of talk about starting families, but no one ever talks about finishing what they started.
What do you call a blonde in the freezer? Her parents named her Jessica, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
A dark sense of humor is like a pair of functioning legs. Not everybody has one.
What's the difference between Harry Potter and a holocaust victim? Harry made it out of the chamber.
What is the difference between men and women?
Men have 2 heads, women have 4 lips because men do all the thinking, and women do all the talking.
What takes 10 parking spaces? 5 women
Why are life and penis alike? Women make both of them hard.
What is the fastest way to spread a rumor?
Telephone? No.
Television? No.
How then? Tell a woman!
Q: What do you call a girl walking down a street?
A: Lost, she's supposed to be in the kitchen.