14 year old boy jokes

What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?

He said he was awfully touched!

What's the difference between a 14-year-old boy and an 8-year-old boy?

The 14-year-old is on top, the 8-year-old is on the bottom.

When I was 14, my mum caught me wanking, and she slapped me across the face. A couple weeks later, my dad caught me having a beer, and he made me drink 40 beers. I just thought, "Well, I'm glad he didn't catch me wanking."

What is a similarity between a pregnant 14-year-old and the fetus inside of her?

They both are thinking, "Shit! Mom is gonna kill me!"

As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.

Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.

Average Kid: brings mp3 to school.

Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school.

Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5.

A 10-year-old: "I don't want to smile without having a reason to. People shouldn't think I'm happy 24/7."

A 10-year-old, a week later: "Damn... my life is shitty..."

<2 years later> 12-year-old: "What is de-pre-ssion?" *googles it*

Now 14-year-old: "Oh..."