Worst Jokes Ever

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Worst Jokes Ever

While Memes

DaRey1Cray

A man is shown in a close up shot with a headline, "Something Bit My Ass cheek While Taking a Shit" and the user name of "EatDatPussy445" with a view count of "403 views" and "11 minutes ago".

Heroin Monkey

NEWS
Pantless driver dies
after being ejected
through his sunroof
while masturbating
to porn on a
cellphone when the
car crashed and
rolled over

Heroin Monkey

A collage of screenshots of Scotty Kilmer's YouTube videos. Each video has a different theme: using fuel additives when one can't afford beer, being drunk, and keeping secrets. The word "Secret" is overlaid twice on two different videos. The word "Drunk" is overlaid on one video.

tabs1528

The image shows a news graphic with the headline "Florida man claims he only drank at stoplights, and not while driving" along with the text "arrested for DUI" and a mugshot of Earle Stevens.

MEME LORD

I need a female to fart in my mouth -
m4w - 34 (Detroit)
age: 34
I want a big beautiful black lady here in
Detroit to fart in my mouth with gas. I just
want you to get on the couch and bend over so
I can open my mouth wrap my lips around
your asshole. I need you to fart loud and long
filling up my mouth, while I mastubate.

Heroin Monkey

A face with a serious, almost annoyed expression is in focus. The text on top reads: "How I look at the guy using the urinal next to me who just said, 'Where there's rain, there's thunder!' as he farts while pissing."

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of two Instagram posts. The first post, from user fatgirlhedonist, says "Idk who needs to hear this, but I switched from buying coffee every day to making it at home 2 years ago and I'm still not a millionaire." The second post, from user brianmstewart, is pinned and replies "I have studied the habits of millionaires. While it is a good step to save money by making coffee at home, have you considered supplementing your income by committing massive fraud?"

Heroin Monkey

A tweet that reads: "Burger King and Popeye's having a chicken sandwich war while being owned by the same parent company is the greatest real-life analogy for our modern American political parties."

Heroin Monkey

The image is a meme comparing the reactions of three U.S. presidents, Ronald Reagan, John F. Kennedy, and Theodore Roosevelt, to being shot. For Ronald Reagan, the text says he "gets shot once," "cries about it," and "immediately enacts gun control like a scared baby." For John F. Kennedy, it says he "gets shot twice," "eats the first shot for breakfast," and the "second shot blows his brains all over his wife on live TV like a boss." For Theodore Roosevelt, it says he "gets shot once while giving a speech in front of a huge audience," "laughs it off," and "continues to give his speech for the next hour while roasting the would-be assassin."

Anonymous

Goober cat

A three-panel image of a black cat. The first panel shows the cat with one normal eye and one large googly eye. The second panel shows the cat looking nervously at a hand reaching down to pet it. The third panel shows the cat looking cautiously around.

Anonymous

Dad: Do you wanna know what your sister said while she
lost her virginity?
Son: Dad, please stop this is inappropriate
Dad: Exactly

rapboat

The image is a cartoon-style drawing featuring four characters. At the top, Eminem is depicted with spiky black hair and a serious expression, labeled with "Eminem" above his head. Below him and slightly to the left, Drake is drawn as a cartoon character with a straw hat, labeled as "Drake". Next to Drake is J Cole, also drawn as a cartoon with spiky hair, labeled as "J Cole". On the far right of the bottom, Kendrick is shown as a cartoon character with a headband, labeled as "Kendrick". They are all set against a green background with some trees.

Blach666

A text message conversation where the first person mentions seeing their uncle's lambs, then reveals that the uncle has 370 pregnant sheep, and finally asks if the recipient wants to know who the father is.

Heroin Monkey

The image shows text saying "8 year old me in my room listening to Minecraft parodies while my parents argue in the kitchen:" above a blurry video showing a person dancing in a room.

Heroin Monkey

The 6 year old at Walmart
directing his morbidly obese
mother while she parks her
mobility scooter

ℑ𝔪 𝔚𝔦𝔱𝔥 𝔖𝔱𝔲𝔭𝔦𝔡

" I WANNA GO TO SCHOOL MOMMY!"

A green and yellow crossing sign with a figure of an adult and child walking is displayed. A news banner reads: "CRIME STUDENT STRUCK BY VEHICLE". Above this there is text: "Student hit by car while walking to Tanana Middle School". Below is the text "I WANNA GO TO SCHOOL MOMMY!".

Heroin Monkey

When the FBI kicks down your door
while you beating your meat to the 500
terabytes of polygender midget furry
austismic monkey porn that you stole
+Kaylie D
My time has come

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a text list titled 'Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator'. The list provides humorous and absurd actions to perform inside an elevator.

Wade XL

The image is a collage. The top part shows a news headline about an armed Pizza Hut employee who shot and killed a robber. Below is an image of a person with a pizza box on their head, a blood-splattered apron, and holding a pizza peel. The text says "Nobody out pizzas the hut".

Heroin Monkey

A list of ten things to do in an elevator. The text reads: Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator. 1. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 2. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?" 3. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!" 4. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking. 5. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on". 6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly. 7. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. 8. Dress up as the devil and then ask other people as they get in, "Going down?" 9. Drag a desk into the elevator. Ask "Do you have an appointment?" 10. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."

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