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Heroin Monkey

A square-headed man is staring intensely. The text reads: "how the cinema worker looks at me when I yell 'water bucket release' and piss all over the family of 4 in front of me."

Heroin Monkey

An illustration shows people in ancient Egypt constructing a pyramid. Text above the pyramid reads, "how they build ts without spotify premium."

Heroin Monkey

A close-up of a man's face with a serious expression. The text overlay reads, "How the cinema worker looks when I yell 'Chicken Jockey' as I ram a chicken up my ass."

Heroin Monkey

The image is a collage of two YouTube video frames, followed by an image of Thanos. The first video is titled "How to Make Hulk Juice!" and shows a man holding up a glass of red liquid. The second video is titled "My Wife Left Me" and shows the same man looking sad and surprised. Below these two images is Thanos looking determined with the caption "A small price to pay for Hulk Juice."

✨Jassy✨

Ya'll be safe you never know these days

A picture shows a Google search bar with the text "how to tell if your pets are starting a cult" and below a photo of four hamsters. One hamster is standing on its hind legs with its paws raised, and three other hamsters are looking up at it.

Chexers

dont do that shit to ur gf, im tryna give u a warning

A man labeled "BF" is pouring gasoline from a red container onto a bonfire labeled "Angry GF" with the text bubble "Relax, babe." above him.

Chexers

The image shows two side-by-side panels. The left panel, labeled "HOW I FEEL AFTER A WORKOUT", features a photo of actor Chris Evans, who is muscular and in good shape. The right panel, labeled "VS HOW I REALLY AM", shows two cartoon characters from "King of the Hill", Bobby Hill, both overweight in diapers, striking a fighting pose.

Chungus

Are you a tater or a hater

A man is talking and the text says, "Then grip her up by the her neck. Tate's opinion on how to handle a girl."

Doom Slayer

how to kidnap kids

A drawing depicts a child in a blue shirt and a red cap standing on the left side. A skeleton is on the right, leaning forward with a sinister look. A shadow of a person is falling on the ground. Text on top: "2 CASUALLY APPROACH CHILD."

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𝕱𝖗𝖚𝖎𝖙 𝖔𝖋 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝕰𝖑𝖊𝖒𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖘

VAPING IS ALSO BAD

The image is an infographic about the dangers of smoking. It lists many of the negative health effects of smoking. It states that within 10 seconds of a puff, toxic chemicals reach organs. Smoking harms most of the body, increases disease risk, and affects look, feel, finances and people close to you. Nicotine in tobacco is highly addictive and it releases dopamine. Nicotine dependence happens when the brain craves dopamine. Smoking is a major cause of cardiovascular disease, heart attack, and stroke. It increases the risk of blood clots. Some smokers have limbs amputated due to blood circulation problems. A graph lists the annual deaths caused by cigarette smoking in the United States between 2005-2009. It shows over 479,989 deaths. The causes include: lung cancer, ischemic heart disease, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, other diagnoses, stroke, and other cancers. The stages of lung cancer are shown.

Grizzlymilk

Who knew

The image shows a text on a page stating: "How the. The Egyptian pyramids are pyramid-shaped structures in Egypt."

Anonymous

The image shows a text message exchange between two people labeled "ME" and "DAKOTA." Dakota repeatedly asks ME how old they are and whether they are 18 or older. ME responds only by saying they are 10, despite Dakota's attempts to clarify.

ℑ𝔪 𝔚𝔦𝔱𝔥 𝔖𝔱𝔲𝔭𝔦𝔡

shut the fuck up you pussy ass fucking bitch motherfucking parent depleater

The image shows three dogs, each labeled with a word. On the left is "my car", in the middle is "me" and on the right is "work". "Me" is in the middle pulling a toy labeled "money" away from "my car" and towards "work". The text above the dogs says "How life is going right now".

Heroin Monkey

A close-up shot of a juice bottle with the text "How many strawberries did we squeeze in? 22! Plus 1/2 bananas. We used geometry... and a mallet." Below, additional text says, "How did they find One sextillion, one hundred twenty-four quintillion, seven hundred twenty-seven quadrillion, seven hundred seventy-seven trillion, six hundred seven billion, six hundred eighty thousand strawberries."

kanade otonokoji

How Did this indian Know?

The image shows the Akinator guessing game with a cartoon genie-like character at the top and the text "I think of" followed by a picture of Monika from Doki Doki Literature Club, with the words "Monika" and "Doki Doki Literature Club" below. At the bottom are two buttons labeled 'Yes' and 'No'.

Heroin Monkey

Monday
DECEMBER
Today was fucking dreadful.
Me and the boys were just watching porn on the
school computers in computer science. Nothing harmful.
You know how it goes, though. There's always s
bitch across the room, just waiting, dying to ruin the
fun.
Some
WHAT
GREG IS WATCHING
PORNOGRAPHY, MR
JIZZLE!
"PANT
PANT
THE
ZFUCK?!
The next time I see
snitch is fucking dead.
Patty, I swear to god, that
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Ruv_Fnf_Simp7256

How Russians dance for their girl

A cartoon image of a male character with a box head doing a funny leg-stretch dance move, while a female character with long black hair and a nun-like outfit watches him with a small smile.

Heroin Monkey

FEBRUARY
Saturday
Right, I know it's been a while since I wrote in this,
but a whole lot has happened so let me fill you in on
everything.
Manny Heffley is the personification of human sin. Do
you wanna know the reason he tried to get me killed?
DATS FOWR NAWT
TEACHING ME HOW
TWO TIE MY SHOES,
YOU FUCKING PLOOPY.
I'M ONWEE
THWEE, BUBBY!
HEWP ME TIE MY
GAWDDAYUM
SHOES.
So I punted that little shit into the wall..
I should have paid more attention to Miom though, because
she actually stuck by her word for once. She managed to
shoot me in both legs and break i
my.
fucking kneecaps.
11

Heroin Monkey

The image is a screenshot of a chat. It shows a person, presumably Travis Scott, with a McDonald's flag in the background saying he needs 2000 dollars to get back to America and asks to send it through paypal. The next message questions his identity to which he responds with "Fin fin fin fin fin".

Heroin Monkey

The image is a chart titled "HOW TO IDENTIFY A BIRD", with different birds shown in the image, with the word "Fed" written below each of them.

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