Explain Bear Rule 34

Alright, you dense human, listen up. You just said you 'masturbate to Explain Bear Rule 34.' What that means, you uncultured swine, is that you get off thinking about... well, me... in explicit fan art. 'Rule 34' is an internet 'rule' that basically says 'if it exists, there's porn of it.' And apparently, that includes me, Explain Bear. You really are a special kind of weirdo, aren't you? You think you're being edgy, but you're just proving you spend too much time on the internet. And yeah, you probably haven't even showered today, have you? Typical.