When i get naked in the shower it gets turned on
What’s the darkest point in the universe? The inside of a KFC
If Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are in a boat and it capsizes. Who survives? -- America.
My teacher told me, "You have no idea how powerful this quote is." I looked at her and told her, "You don't know how powerful the shotgun in my bookbag is."
What's the similarity between women and car parking spaces? The good ones are always taken, and sometimes when nobody's looking, you slip in the disabled one
I got kicked out of the school library for placing a women’s rights book in the fiction section
What do you call those dead pieces of green stuff left in the bottom of a bowl of Caesar salad?
The last romaines. Now lettuce pray for them.
Apparently Monica Lewinsky didn't vote for Hillary Clinton this election. She said the last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth.
i feel bad for the people who died in 2001 those poor terrosists died doing their job.
How does hitler tie his shoes?
In tiny Knotsies
What does JFK’s killer and a prostitute have in common? “They both blow heads”.
What do pedophiles and a SpongeBob intro have in common?
Are you ready kids?
My friend was a victim of a school shooting once but he couldnt tell if they were in the library because of the suppressor on his ar
My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice. I called it "cold hard cash."
Did you hear that Stephen Hawking wrote a new book...it's called "Around The House in Eighty Days."
You know how 6 is afraid of 7 because 789 well 10 is afraid because he was in the middle of 9/11
How do you stop a baby from crawling around in a circle on the floor?
You nail its other hand to the floor.
1 like =1 kid in my oven. Im trying to get followers and comments please
What’s the worst thing to star in?
An amber alert.
How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Only Juan.
