Heftiness jokes
You want to know how to spot a foster kid?
Them carrying their whole life in a Hefty trash bag.
A big hefty porker left his balls exposed and said,
"Misses!! Come here and step upon mine balls, please!!! I pay top dollar for this extreme delight!"
She pippity popped his balls like there was no tomorrow.
And he said "yuh yuh ay ay crush these nuts nuts!"
In the beginning of the 20th century, a young girl called Edit left her home country of Sweden and crossed the Ocean to make a new life in America. Unfortunately, it did not go all that well, and she soon found herself homeless, begging for food or money to survive.
She used to occupy a street next to a theater, not because it meant hefty handouts, but because it was a place where no other beggars or police bothered her. Every night, a new crowd came to see a show, and the cute young girl found just enough mercy to survive. In fact, she did so well that she decided to afford herself a small piece of cake every Tuesday, just to keep her spirits up.
One Tuesday, she could not get a break. Looked like she will go without cake this week. Then, a strange-looking gentleman stopped near her. He soon heard her story and decided to share his fortune.
Gentleman: "I work as a magician in the touring show; today, we performed here. Some nights, our guests want to gamble with us afterwards, and I make sure to bring home more than I came with. I try to keep it moderate, but today, this obnoxious drunk was loaded, so I emptied his pockets. Here, take this precious coin."
Tell a woman she's beautiful a hundred times, and she won't believe you. Tell a woman she's fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.
I saw a fat girl with a 'Guess' t-shirt, so I said, "286lb."
You shouldn’t bully fat people.
They already have enough on their plate.
New study reveals that women slightly overweight live longer... than the men who mention it.
I saw a fat dude wearing a shirt that said "guess." I said 215kg, he didn't find it as funny.