There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette. They were all trapped on an island and the nearest shore was 50 miles away. The redhead swam trying to make it to the other shore, she swam 15 miles, drowned, and died. The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died. The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back.
why did the chicken cross the road.
to die
Two scientists walk into a bar. One says ̈I want h20” the other said ̈ I want h20 too ̈ The second scientist died.
roses are red violets are violets my dad died in 9/11 and he was a good piolet
“Daddy, what are those 2 things on mum’s chest?”. Asked Tom “Those are just....balloons”.said dad (Later) “Dad! I think mum’s dying!”said Tom. “Why?” Asked dad. “Because uncles blowing her balloons and she said “oh god im cumming!”
I’ll never forget my Granddad’s last words to me just before he died. “Are you still holding the ladder?”
My uncle died on September 11. He was the greatest pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
I wanna die
Where do mathematicians go to die?
The symmetry
your mama so fat the flash died half way running around her
It want to die like my grandpa, with a blindfold and a wet sponge on his head
What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.
Night chat. #love u forever maybe until I die! 🌸
what do you call it when a person dies in panera bread
panera dead
What was found under MJ's pillow after he died?
Billy's jeans.
when your deppresed about the world :( but you remember you will soon die :)
I actually think paul walker was a good man, he did not deserve to be burned alive
He had a change of race tho when he died
What song did the Titanic victims listen to as they died?
Ice, Ice Baby!!
A young boy is stood on the top of a cliff crying. A priest approaches and says, 'why are you crying my son?' 'my parents just crashed the car off the cliff and died,' 'it's just not your day today is it' Said the priest, unbuttoning his flies.
So, I was getting on a plane, and the pilot does his usual speech talking about altitude and what not with the microphone, and he forgets to turn it off, so after the speech I heard him and the co pilot talking about what they were doing after work, and whatnot, then the pilot said he was dying for a blowjob and a coffee, so a stewardess ran to the pilots cabin, and then left about 15 minutes later, and the pilot shouted "Next time don't forget the coffee!"