Didn T Jokes

I heard a pretty juicy rumor about butter. But i decited i didn't want to spread it

One day a teacher stands up in front of her class and asks if anyone in the class is an idiot, and says that if there is one then he/she should stand up. After a minute a boy stands up.

The teacher then asks the boy if he actually thinks he's an idiot.

The boy says, "No, I just didn't want to see you standing there all by yourself."

You walk into a mcdonalds and you ask for some extra mayo and they put to much on there. I say I didn't order a Mc cumshot

Who are the fastest readers in the world?

9/11 victims, they went through 80 stories in 7 seconds. In case you didn't see that one coming, don't feel bad, they didn't either

Y did Steven hawking die he didn’t pay his electricity bills

Look I didn't hit rock bottom I gracefully floated down there like Mary Poppins with an umbrella.

why didn’t the bike stand on its own?

it was 2 tired

How did the man with no arms commit suicide? We'll never know - he didn't leave a note.

My wife cheated on me with my brother She didn't have a sister so I improvised and now all I have to do is wait nine months for one to come

People say that biting off your finger would be as easy as biting a carrot if your brain didn't try to stop you. How the f do people know that and how many people's fingers did they bite off before coming to that conclusion.

I hate jokes about 9/11... every joke has the tendency to crash and burn.

"I didn't get the joke at first but then it hit me like a plane," the joke was so dark a cop almost shot it.

Mother, “Johnny, if you keep being this naughty, you’ll get kids who will be very naughty to you!” Johnny, “Oh mom, you just betrayed yourself there, didn’t you?” Source: http://jokesfan.com/little-johnny-jokes.html

What did a terrorist say when New York didn't want his food?

Here Comes The Airplane!

covid said to stay 6 feet...i didn't think Kobe meant it literally

Why didn't the Asian get a high five because Logan Paul left him hanging

A priest is drowning in a river... A boat comes along and asks to help him. He says "leave me alone, god will save me." The next day another boat came along and asked to help him. Again he said "leave me alone, god will save me. " The next day the last boat came and asked to help him. Once again he told the boat that god will save him. The next day he died. He went to heaven and asked god "why didn't you save me. " God said "I sent you three f*****ing boats and you didn't take them! "

Americans when they think they have the best offensive British jokes: we threw your tea in the ocean. 💀

British people making offensive jokes about America: our towers didn’t explode.😎

Why did hitler kill himself?

He didn’t want to pay the gas bill

Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.

Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronising her, claim she knew how to do it anyway and that even if she didn’t, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.