So I didn't want my mom going through my laptop so I put a touch screen on it where you just have to tap the screen to unlock it jokes on her she doesn't have any fingers.
I was playing Mortal Kombat with my friend when he picked the fighter Pristiano Penaldo. I won and the voice didn't say "Finish him", so i couldn't do a fatality. I was confused but i understood that the game didn't let me finish him because he is already finished.
Everybody misses Xxxtentacion but the bullet didn't...
Why didn't the koala make the finals?. It got diskoalafide
Why didn't Sally get home from work.
She got hit by a bus
How did the rich save the poor?
They didn't let them in the titanic
You was sleeping it didn't count - chloe Foxwell 2021:)))))))
I walked into a room full of men masturbating. -- They all looked shocked when I didn't stop.
Why was 6 afraid to go camping with 7?
Because 7 ONEted TWO bring THREE knives FOUR surFIVEal, but 6 secretly knew that 7 hEIGHTed him, and didn’t have beNINE inTENtions.
Read this out loud to yourself and it’ll make sense. ;)
The orphanage was open in apps but I didn’t see the home button.
Why Couldn't The Astronaut Put The Helmet On His Head?
Because He Didn't Have Enough Space
A funny joke scenario Person 1: Why didn't he skeleton go to the dance?
Person 2: Because he had no "body" to go with.
Person 1: Because he was ugly fat and nobody liked him
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common: they should both be changed regularly... and for the same reason. Trump and Biden didn’t get the memo.
I called a Suicide Helpline, but they didn't help me commit suicide. Tbh they really left me hanging there
Why did Helen Keller ride a broken roller coaster?
She didn't see anything wrong with it
I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: why didn't you drug her again so she would forget?
You wanna know who didn't kick the bucket? Stephen Hawking didn't; nor did he bite the dust.
I haven't talked to my wife in three weeks. -- I didn't want to interrupt her.
Why did lil Susie fall off the swing? She didn’t have any arms. Knock knock, Who’s there? Not lil Susie
A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands for money.
Once he is given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "Yes sir, I did."
The robber shot him in the head, killing him instantly.
He then turned to a couple standing next to him and asked the man, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "No sir, I didn't, but my wife did!"
