Ares jokes

You see a cat, it's dead, you are dead.

Your hairline is pushed back; we can see what you are thinking of.

The convoy truckers are a joke.

Ben 10 and a disabled person are the same, but no aliens for the disabled person.

Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.

What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?

Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”

People always often say to someone who are thinking about suicide that's the easy way out. Don't give up! All I say is I'm not giving up, just I'm giving in, and does it really seem like it's the easiest way out? I don't think so, it's probably the hardest if you ask me, or I would have done it already, but someone's got to do it.

You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.

Guys, we gotta stop telling these jokes. They are getting out of h- oh wait no .... Continue.

Yo daddy so stupid, he threw a Father’s Day party at the orphanage.

What did the Catholic priest say to the other Catholic priest as they entered the orphanage? Let’s us prey.

Why does your mom hate you?

Because you are a loser.

I saw a little kid crying because he was lost. I asked him, "Where are your parents?"

God, I love working in an orphanage!

You’ll parsley believe how many puns I have. Hopefully your funny-bone isn’t broken because these are real rib-ticklers.

Blessed Brian, your secrets are safe with me... because I wasn’t listening when you told them.

Roses are red, My c0ck is blue, Oh shit, what happened to you?

If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?

God creates dog.

God: "You are man's best friend."

Dog: "That's pretty sexist."

God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"

Dog: "....."

God: "And chocolate kills you!"

Dog: "🐶"

Bro, are you an Oompa Loompa? Because you look like you just came from the chocolate factory.

Why are orphans so bad at baseball?

Because they can't go home.

Hey girl, are you a diamond pick?

'Cause I'm as hard as obsidian.

Good morning, Gwen, how are you?