Ares Jokes

If you are American in the living room, what are you in the bathroom?

Euro-peein

Back in Australia, my puns are high koala-tea!

Alex: Dad can we get me a little brother from the orphanage? dad: Sure Alex! dad: Were here! orphanage manager: Alex! You are so big now! Alex: Dad what is she talking about?!

I started selling landmines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are through the roof!

It's funny how teachers are supposed to educate new lives but only teach certain kids how much they want to commit suicide and how many ways there are.

COP: Are you high?

ME: If I was high, could I do this? *walks in a perfectly straight line*

COP: Wth he just walked off a cliff

Roses are red, that much is true. But violets are Purple, not fucking blue.

Girls are like math, if theyre under 10 use your fingers

Teacher I was a orphan once

Student oof

Teacher who are we missing

Student you’re parents

What do KFC and pussy have in common? Both are finger lickin' good and after you are done eating you have a box to put the bone in.

There was a kid crying. I asked him where his perants were. He cried more. Orphanages are really fun to work at.

Rizz

Are you a basketball hoop? 'Cause I want to put my balls in you. Are you a photo biographer? 'Cause I can picture us together.

Nazis have marched in Melbourne. Are you sure Eric Clapton and Carrie Underwood are not touring in Australia?

Blue: The ocean is place where the creatures live Black: NIGHTMARES LIVE Blue:it has many pretty things and it will- Black: KILL YA TO DEATH! Especially if you are on titanic! so let that sink in. PUN INTENDED!

"Man, your jokes about homicide are totally killer!"

Abortion clinics are kind of like NAZI gas chambers. Less people come out than go in.

The school shooter: I finally found you worthless crybabies!! The Quiet Kid: How are a bag of chips and a mac11 the same? The school shooter: I don't know. The Quiet kid: When you pull them out every body wants to be your friend.