A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his best friend's a pussy and his owner beats him.
A boy asks his father:
What is politics?
Father answers:
It’s very simple! You see, I bring in the money, so I’m big business . Your mother spends the money, so she’s the government.
Your grandfather sees to it that everything is managed in an orderly way. So he’s the law.
Our maid is the working class.
Everything revolves around your interests, so you’re the people. Your little baby brother represents the future.
The boy has to think it over. That night he hears his little brother crying due to a dirty diaper. He doesn’t know what to do, so he goes to the bedroom of his parents. There his mother is sound asleep. He goes to the bedroom of the maid, but his father is there fucking the maid — and oddly enough his grandfather is watching through the window.
Nobody notices the boy and he returns to his bed.
The next day his father asks him:
So, can you now explain to me what politics is?
The boy says:
Yes, it’s all become clear to me!
Big business screws over the working class while the law watches and the government sleeps. The people are ignored and the future lies in shit.
why did i give an orphan the iphone X? because it is the first one without a home button.
People ask me, are you an organ donor?
"Yeah, over my dead body."
What do you call an inexpensive circumcision? A rip-off.
How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour gasoline on it then light it on fire and it will go "WOOF" How do you make a dog sound like a cat? Put it in the deep freeze until frozen solid, then run it through an electric saw and it will go "MMMRROWWWWWW"
i went to see my dentist and she warned me it was going to hurt. then she told me she was having an affair with my husband. good news though...the cleaning didnt hurt.
Q: Do you know why God created yeast infections?
A: So women will know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt too
You do 1 line, you're not a crack head You drink 1 beer, you're not an alcoholic But I murder 1 person...
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Answer:special forces
