ANS jokes
Y'all is ugly!
How does an emo greet people?
“What’s down?”
What do you call an orphan when he's taking a photo?
Family photo.
Q. What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?
Abortion clinics don't do deliveries.
How do you make an orphan shut up?
You tell his mom.
Madden Whiffen, a curious soul, With an appetite beyond control, A bottomless pit, never satisfied, Ingesting all that's placed beside.
From dawn till dusk, he feasts his way, Devouring meals without delay, With gusto he consumes, without restrain, Every morsel, every crumb, he'll obtain.
No dish too large, no portion too small, His hunger insatiable, devouring it all, From succulent meats to delicate greens, He relishes the flavors, savoring each scene.
A culinary adventure, forever he embarks, Sampling cuisines from all walks and arcs, From street food to gourmet, he seeks it all, His palate an explorer, on a constant sprawl.
He savors the spices, the textures, the taste, In a gastronomic journey, no time to waste, For Madden Whiffen, the food is his muse, A symphony of flavors, he'll never refuse.
But caution, dear friends, in this feeding spree, For gluttony can lead to a troublesome plea, Madden Whiffen, beware the consequences, For overindulgence brings no recompenses.
In the realm of cuisine, he reigns supreme, A legend of eating, a man of extreme, Madden Whiffen, the one who eats it all, In his gastronomic pursuit, he stands tall.
So let us marvel at his voracious might, As he devours dishes, day and night, For in Madden Whiffen, we witness the feat, A man who eats everything, a culinary elite.
Once there was an old lady...
Congratulations, stop bragging!
Why does an orphan have an iPhone X?
Because they have no home button.
Q' What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite type of comedy?
A. I forget.
Did you know that if you go into an orphanage and tell them a "yo mama" joke, they won’t get it?
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple always gets picked!
What do you call an orphan taking a picture of themself?
A family photo.
I gave Helen Keller an Oculus and AirPods for her 12th birthday, and she hated them and me.
What do you call an idiot?
An absolute imbecile.
Why do orphans not like the movie Frozen?
Because for them, love isn't an open door.
What is an orphan's first step to the orphanage?
I went on a date with an Eastern European chick. She got mad because I rushed her...
Get it? It's Russia, and I rushed her.
What do you call an Asian, a blind man, and a very bad driver?
A professional golfer driving his Porsche picked up an Irish girl hitchhiker. He had his golfing gear on the back seat. The Irish girl picked up something and asked, "What are these?"
"Those are tees," he said. "I rest my balls on them when I drive."
"Wow!" said the girl. "What will those car makers think of next!"
My friend is a pimp.
I think he's having an existential crisis. Lately, he just wants to be alone with his thots.