Grandpa: you can't have phones within 15 feet of the table Me: and you aren't allowed within 100 feet of the elementary school
James
What do strippers and peanut butter have in common?: They both spread for bread
An apple and an emo kid fall off a tree at the same time. Who hits the ground first?
The apple because the emo kid got caught by the rope
Teacher: I was an orphan when I was a kid
Students:oof
Teacher:Is anyone missing
Students:yea your parents
An american is touring the Soviet union. A russian takes him to a school so he can see what its like. He asks the kids if they like the Soviet Union. All of the kids say yes they love it. All but one. That kid bursts out crying. The american asks whats wrong and he cries "I want to live in the Soviet Union!"
Why’s America suck at chess They lost two towers
What do you call girl skeleton dancing... A bone et
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side LOL
My mom told me to be positive ... I was heading to a HIV test.
If you wanna hit somebody, hit an orfan, what are they gonna do... tel their parents
What’s Michael Jackson’s favourite movie? Black and white.
The witch doctor came in my mouth last week. First hot meal I’ve had in weeks
You take four then you put a n at then end then you take the u aut then you replace the f with a p what do you git