Thereness jokes
Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.
You, I didn’t see you there. The pizza place is hunted bad, so you are scared 😱😱😱😱 and so you run and you see your grandma, and you were happy again forever and ever ha ha so funny 😁. The end or is it bye-bye?
Me: Knock knock.
My Grandma: Who’s there?
Me: Interrupting cow.
My Grandma: Interrupting c-
[Dies from heart attack]
How does the sea say hello?
It WAVES you.
SEA what I did there?
I'm SHORE you saw it.
Don't be SALTY!
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Dishes."
"Dishes who?"
"Dishes a bad joke."
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going to the airport, which one gets there first? The lesbian, duh, they get there "lickety-split."
Knock, knock? Who's there? French. French who? French fries!
There was a family, the father's name was Mad, the mother is Brain, the brother's name is Nobody and the sister's name is Everybody.
One day, Nobody killed Everybody, and the father ran to the police's office and screamed, "NOBODY KILLED EVERYBODY!!!!!"
"Sir, are you okay?" The police asked.
"I said, NOBODY KILLED EVERYBODYYYYY!!!!!" The father yelled even louder.
"Are you mad?" The police asked.
"Yes, because my name is Mad!" The father exclaimed.
"Where's your brain?" Asked the police.
"At home because my wife name is Brain," the father said. The police fell down due to the confusion.
Look behind you, there is Stephen Hawking.
Nobody.
The Twin Towers are just like genders.
There used to be two, but now it's a sensitive topic.
Why did the Chicken cross the road? You: Why? To get to the little b***h's house!
Knock knock! You: Who's there? The chicken!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Owl.
Owl who?
Who? Are you meant to ask "who?"
Why is there more water than water, because water is water.
Have you ever been to the ocean? Well, the smokers out there probably only seaweed!
*trigger alert*
Why did the racist cop shut down the space brothel?
Because there were too many black holes.
They are making new versions of the Star Wars films. The names have only just come out.
There is Star Wars: Attack of the Trannies, Star Wars: The Trannie Awakens, Star Wars: Rogue Trannie, Star Wars: The LGBTQ Strikes Back, and then there is Star Wars: The Last Straight Man.
Why are orphans sad when playing Roblox?
There isn't any parents on Roblox.
Do you know why in France there is a cheese named "fromage à râpe?"
Because the cheese got raped.
Roses are red, violets are blue, and if you're my friend, I'll be there till the end.
I went to my local shooting range today but was surprised to see that the news reported a school shooting there. I still don't know who snitched...