Thereness jokes
What did the mad penis say to the vagina? “Don’t make me come in there!”
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Please.
Please who?
Police, can you stop talking so we can get to the end of the joke.
Lol.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
Little old lady, you don't need to yodel about it. Yodel who? Yodel who?
Why isn't there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in another box.
So, I remember growing my own peanuts really well. There's one that's larger than the others. I can't keep my eye off of it.
I'm scared that it moves at night.
I'm being serious. I literally can't keep my eye off it.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I did not say banana? Ha ha!
Why would an orphan kill his family? Because they weren't there.
How are an orphan and baseball different from each other?
A baseball game has a home run.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
UR MUM!
You're so ugly that when your mama had you, she tried to give you away, but there was nowhere to give you.
There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.
Three men are on a bench in Soviet Russia talking shit about Stalin. One of the men all of a sudden pulls out a KGB badge and says, "You two are coming with me for treason." One of the other men also pulls out a badge and says, "Not me." The third man pulls out a badge and says, "Wow? There's a lot of agents here."
Yo mama so black, when God saw her, he said, "Let there be light!" but twice.
What's worse, being loved or hated? 'Cause when you're loved you could be left alone or be betrayed, but when you're hated no one's there to leave you. What do you think?
I was at my boyfriend's house, and I thought he was cheating on me. He was on the phone with somebody, and he said he'd be over there soon. So I asked him if I could see his phone. He said no, and then we fought about it until I saw his gun, and because I thought he was lying to me, I shot him, went through his phone, and his friend was still on the phone.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, A face like yours belongs in the zoo, But don't you worry, I'll be there too, Not in a cage, but laughing at you!
What is the difference between Twitter and this website?
There's no difference.
There is a kid in my school who is exactly like Dahmer, but he doesn't eat ppl. Or does he...?
He's Dahmer's son @domink.
Is that a person over there?
Na, it's Jesus.
Is it all right when there is nothing left?