Hypothetical jokes
If you could add one zero to any number for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?
Would you rather have ten babies in one trash can or one baby in ten trash cans?
My wife and I watched the movie Indecent Proposal last night. Afterwards, I asked her if she'd sleep with Robert Redford for $1,000,000. She said, "Sure, but where am I gonna get that kind of money?"
The British equivalent to 9/11 would be a big red bus crashing into Big Ben.
God, when terminally ill children beg him to heal them:
God: No, I don’t want to.
If Asriel were Sans, would his theme be "Jokes and Memes"?
How many feminists does it take to fix a lightbulb?
9: one to screw the lightbulb, one to film it, one to post about it on a women empowerment social media page, one to complain that the man didn’t screw the lightbulb, one to say that women deserve to screw more lightbulbs, one to try to get #womenlightbulbscrewers trending on Twitter, one to bring a man and show him the screwing, one to say that women are better than men at screwing lightbulbs, and one to make a speech about the lightbulb.
What's the difference between a (hypothetical) girl and cancer?
Her dad didn't beat cancer.
Imagine working at the World Trade Center, only for Osama bin Laden to call and ask if he could crash at your place.
Imagine Michael Jackson having kids? Would they come out Black or white or plastic?
My father taught me a lesson of sex in a hypothetical way.
My stepmother gave me a lesson [on] how [it] is going inside?
If trees were sentient, they would make their furniture out of bone, flesh, and blood.
Now ain't that cool?
Ryan: Mother, if you had 10 cookies, and I took 4 away from you, how much do you have?
Mother: I will still have ten cookies, because I will not give any to you.
Ryan: What if I forcefully take 4 cookies away from you?
Mother: I will have 10 cookies and a dead body.
Ryan and his mother had cookies that day. Ryan took all 10 cookies. He was never seen again. R.I.P Ryan.
If Martin Luther King were white, what would they call him?
Alive.
Q: If George Washington was alive today, what would he do?
A: Scratch mercilessly at the coffin walls, while screaming at the top of his lungs!