Dying jokes
Have you heard about the Pillsbury Dough Boy? He died of a yeast infection.
Yesterday I had a party.
I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.
I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!
You die. LOL!
I was dying when I called my sister and she said, "Hi, this is Pepperoni's pizza and abortion clinic; your loss, our sauce. How may I help you today?"
Time for a random Terraria joke.
Q: Why did the guide die at his house?
A: The player dropped his doll in the lava.
(WALL OF FLESH HAS AWOKEN) :| Oh crap!
Mom: You can't die in the living room, David, so you can stop stabbing and shooting yourself.
David: I will surpass Kakarot!
Jordan: *dead on the living room floor*
My sister said to kill myself, so now I’m in the hospital hoping to die.
Stephen Hawking died when he ran out of data for the month.
Me: Why did the bus drop his ice cream?
Sanity to live: I don't know?
Me: He was run over by Timmy!!!
Sanity to live? *dies*
Me: *At edge of bridge* Wow, sweet view.
Sanity to live: *resurrected*
Narrator: Sometimes a bridge is all you need...
(sponsored by jumping bridges)
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Someone pulled his ethernet cable (he died of a blue screen)!
How did Steven Hawking die?
He blew a fuse doing an update.
Stephen Hawking died because he did a wheelie and unplugged his charger.
Where is a place where people die?
Rosshall Academy.
Yo mama is so huge, when she was born everyone died.
Where do you go when food dies?
A fooderal.
What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.
My grandpa is an asshole. The fucker deserved to die. The son of a bitch was using his life support, and I needed to change my iPhone.
This is 15 first-year treating a swan.
Students return: "Without payment?"
The word "I die with many important problems."
Later, you answer this point: "DSD, rats?"
In 9/11, people were dying for the pizza. But it was at the bottom, so they had to die for it literally.
Someone prank calls a general. The general hangs up and goes, "Kids these days have no respect for their elders. That's why I send them all to die."