Dying jokes
Stephen Hawking died due to the BIOS update. He shut down because the power cable got chewed.
I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age, but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
So I made a parody for "Me, Myself, and I." It goes like this: "Me, Myself, and I, I'm gonna drink bleach until I die!"
There's something special about cemeteries.
People are dying to get inside.
Why do my kids die?
Stinky Oussy :D
Sayori: *dies*
Monika: "You kinda left her hanging... 😊"
MC: "😨"
When my Uncle Frank died, he wanted his cremations to be buried in his favorite beer mug.
His last wish was to be Frank in Stein.
Chuck Norris died, but Death was too afraid to tell him.
"Why do cemeteries have fences around them? Because everyone's dying to get in!"
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Windows didn’t update in time.
How did Steven Hawking die?
He forgot his log on password.
An orphan died. No one cared, why? Who is supposed to spread the word? His parents.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He rolled away and his charger unplugged.
Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?
It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.
When a Muslim dies, he gets 72 virgins.
It's the same thing with priests, except the virgins are children.
Daughter: So, I got my period.
Mom: That's wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying!
Daughter: That's nice, Mum, but isn't the whole point of getting your period dying?
Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to another day.
Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically.)
Mom: You're welcome, honey. (Clueless, obviously.)
Girlfriend: You remind me of a cell phone.
Girlfriend's ex: Why?
Girlfriend: Because you're about to die.
Tell an emo, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"
Why do orphans want to die?
Because they might see their parents in Heaven.