Dying jokes
I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... She died of hearing aids.
Did you hear about the gay Indian who died?
He was a brave sucker.
How did Mace Windu die?
He fell out the windoo.
I ask the emo girl if she gets jealous when her phone dies.
Depression: Here, your mom just died.
Me: My mom is already dead.
Why did the orphan die?
He killed himself because the lack of a support system made him depressed.
Why do emo kids not get phones? Because the phone dies before them.
My grandpa's last words before he died in Vietnam were, "What the fuck did I step on?"
U die from robot bite.
Hey, wake up. I just murdered your family, but I live alone.
Then who are these people in your house? They are people in my house? Well, not anymore, dumb bitch. You're welcome, you could have died.
Yo mama so hairy, you almost died from a rug burn!
Stephen Hawking died due to the BIOS update. He shut down because the power cable got chewed.
So I made a parody for "Me, Myself, and I." It goes like this: "Me, Myself, and I, I'm gonna drink bleach until I die!"
An orphan died. No one cared, why? Who is supposed to spread the word? His parents.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He rolled away and his charger unplugged.
Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?
It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age, but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.
Hey, what’s your favorite type of tomato? Mine is sun-dried tomato.
Get it? "Sun-dried" like "son died."
When a Muslim dies, he gets 72 virgins.
It's the same thing with priests, except the virgins are children.