Dying jokes
When my Uncle Frank died, he wanted his cremations to be buried in his favorite beer mug.
His last wish was to be Frank in Stein.
"Why do cemeteries have fences around them? Because everyone's dying to get in!"
Why do my kids die?
Stinky Oussy :D
How did Steven Hawking die?
He forgot his log on password.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Windows didn’t update in time.
So I made a parody for "Me, Myself, and I." It goes like this: "Me, Myself, and I, I'm gonna drink bleach until I die!"
I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age, but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He rolled away and his charger unplugged.
Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?
It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.
There's something special about cemeteries.
People are dying to get inside.
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
An orphan died. No one cared, why? Who is supposed to spread the word? His parents.
Chuck Norris died, but Death was too afraid to tell him.
How did Mace Windu die?
He fell out the windoo.
Did you hear about the man who died of a Viagra overdose?
They couldn't close the casket.
Did you know that if you die you can still be a part of family game night!
All you have to do is have your family cremate you and put you in an hour glass, and the games that use hour glasses, well, you will be a part of family game night.
Did you hear about the gay Indian who died?
He was a brave sucker.
I'm gonna eat a hell of a lot of popcorn kernels before I die just to make the cremation a little more interesting.
Titanic is like our president; it cracks in half and dies.
Hey, what’s your favorite type of tomato? Mine is sun-dried tomato.
Get it? "Sun-dried" like "son died."