Do jokes
Why do animals hate playing card games with foxes?
They’re a bunch of cheetahs!
Why do animals have playing cards with foxes?
Because they’re a bunch of cheetahs!
What do orphans need in order to mail letters?
Food stamps.
What do you call a tall, affluent person? A big success.
Son: Dad, do you remember your first blowjob?
Dad: Ohhh yeah, I do!
Son: How did it taste?
Dad: Get out.
What do you call a vagina with multiple clits?
A tongue workout!
What do you call a dinosaur that can’t eat?
Anarexic.
Why do orphans go to church so much?
So they can have someone to call father.
What do you call your daughter's boyfriend when he brings her back past 10pm?
An ambulance.
What do you say when your friend has an ankle sprain?
"Damn bro, you got an ankle spring!"
What do you call a Russian prostitute? Slobadown Mycockyoubitch.
What do you call a Lesbian Dinosaur?
A Doyoulickalotapuss.
A letter to all Math:
Dear Math,
Grow up and solve your own problems!
2x6= DO IT YOURSELF!!!!
How do you plan a party in outer space?
You planet.
What do you call a bad pun?
The pun is not punny!
What do you call a best friend that smokes weed?
A pothead. Just because he's your friend, you don't have to support his poor decisions. Jeez, what has America come to?
Bob the Golden Retriever and Lily the Husky were talking at Bob's house.
Lily: Bob, do you think I'm fat?
Bob: No, Lily, of course not! You're just a little husky!!!! Lol. Golden Retrievers are funny.
How do u catch a tame rabbit?
The tame way.
How do you catch a unique rabbit?
You-neak up on it.
I had a friend named Mari. Sadly, she did drugs.
So one day I go up to her and say, “Mari-juana do this???” She later asked me to leave forever... I don’t gnome why, but... it CRACKed me up a bit!!!