After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "What are you going to do now?"
God said, "I think I'm going to call it a day."
The twin towers are like my parents, only one came back.
(This is a fucked up pick up line) are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11
Claustrophobic people are more productive thinking out of the box.
2 friends are talking and the one says, "I had a good day today, I ran into my ex." The other guy replies, "How is that good?" The Friend says, "I was in my car."
Man walks up to a priest. The man says "I am Jesus Christ." The priest says "No you are not my son." The man says " Follow me." The man walks into the bar and the bartender says "Jesus Christ your back!"
Rape jokes are like your dad's dick. You don't want it but you still get it anyway.
Why do pedophiles never win a race?
Because they are always coming in a little behind.
All these jokes are so offensive Mr. Hawking just won’t stand for it
My friend called me a dick earlier. I said you are what you eat. He then proceeded to run away from me.
In syria, there are no walmarts, only targets
Why don't orphans like to get lost??
Because somebody's going to ask where their parents are.
You know why I don't buy Velcro items anymore?
They are a total rip off.
A pedophile is chatting on the internet : "On a scale of one to ten, how old are you?"
Condoms? HA! Those are for pussies!
How are orphans and blind kids similar?
They both have never seen their parents :)
Why are most firefighters men? Because they like to find hot places and leave them wet.
Roses are red, I dont know why, Living is hard, I want to die.
9/11 jokes aren't funny. They are just plane wrong
In Saudi Arabia, our pick up lines are, Girl are you a terrorist? Cuz you da bomb
