Animal shelter jokes

Yo mama is so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.

Mrs. Harolen: Students, tomorrow's assignment is to bring your parents to school for a conference with the teacher information.

Garen: I want to know who cannot bring their parents to a conference. ORPHANS!

Students: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Mrs. Harolen: Garen sit down! NOW!

Garen: Hey, why can't orphans get a dog? They don't have their parents to drive them to the animal shelter.

Halen: Yeah! Why are orphans racist? Because they never saw their parents with a different race!

Students: No, that's not funny!

Student: SHUT UP!

My wife asked me to get her a puppy. I agreed and went to an animal shelter. As I was searching for a puppy, a fire was set, and the entire animal shelter burned down.

A few hours later, I returned to my wife. She knew I had no puppies and asked why. I replied, "I couldn't find any." She understood but was upset, so I gave her something that I did get. She said, "Wow! This is good, what smokehouse did you get this at?"

I love eating pussy. That’s why the animal shelter is always my go-to for a good meal.

Did you adopt your dog?

What does a stray cat/dog have in common?

Both of them don't have a home!

A family had a very disobedient dog. It would bite the children’s hands when they pet the animal, the dog would piss on everything, and it would chew their shoes. This is why it was adopted.

Zozo the hobo has two frogs and a bunny cage from pet expo. Why? Because he wanted a pet, you idiot!

I adopted a dog. It's gone now.

At least homeless people in China are not starving.