Why did the feminist fail algebra?
She couldn’t solve inequalities.
Sad Sarah
The world burned me so i'll watch the world burn
I cum ( Can't understand math)
How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They just hold it in the socket and expect the world to revolve around them.
Women treat me like a god They ignore me till they need something
Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.
Teach a feminist to fish and she will accuse you of patronising her, claim she knew how to do it anyway and that even if she didn’t, she could easily work it out without the help of a man.
Why is sex like math?
You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. Then I was even sadder, because that lucky guy didn't even *need* shoes!
(not original, but I forgot the source)
I went to a feminist picnic the other day.
It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.
Why was the emo kid thrown out of the amusement park?
He kept cutting in line.
What starts with a P and ends in an S? (hint: men have it and women want it) Pockets
A: Why are you so sad? B: I was watching porn and all of a sudden my wife opened the door.
A: Ok I see, but is that really such a big deal?
B: I mean, she opened the door in the movie
What does a perverted frog say? Rubbit
Girlfriend: "One day I will marry and a lot of men will be sad that day." Boyfriend: "Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?"
It’s true women do make less money than men But it’s their fault because they choose the lower paying jobs. Men, for example, choose the higher paying jobs like doctor or lawyer. Whereas women choose the lower paying jobs like women doctor and women lawyer.
me: i have depression
someone: u should get out more! go outside
me: *goes to the beach* now its a tropical depression
Do you mix concrete for a living? Because you’re making me hard.
Are you winter? Because you will be coming soon.
My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said "I inherited a watering hole." Bewildered I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?" "I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."
. What sexual position produces the ugliest kids? Ask your mum!
A women decides to have a face lift for her 50th birthday She spends $15,000 and looks sensational. On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the clerk, ‘I hope you don’t mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?”.
’About 32,’ is the reply.’
‘Nope! I’m exactly 50,’ the woman says happily.<br> A little while later she goes into McDonald’s and asks the counter girl the very same question.
The girl replies, ‘I’d guess about 29.’ The woman replies with a big smile, ‘Nope, I’m 50.’
Now she’s feeling really good about herself. She stops at a candy shop on her way down the street.
She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the assistant the same burning question.
The clerk responds, ‘Oh, I’d say 30.’
Again she proudly responds, ‘I’m 50, but thank you!’
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.
He replies, ‘Lady, I’m 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra Then, and only then I can tell you EXACTLY how old you are.’
They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the better of her. She finally blurts out, ‘What the hell, go ahead.’
He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast and he gently pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other.
After a couple of minutes of this, she says, ‘Okay, okay.....How old am I?’
He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, ‘Madam, you are 50.’
Stunned and amazed, the woman says, ‘That was incredible, how could you tell?’
‘I was behind you at McDonalds’.