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FEBRUARY
Saturday
Right, I know it's been a while since I wrote in this,
but a whole lot has happened so let me fill you in on
everything.
Manny Heffley is the personification of human sin. Do
you wanna know the reason he tried to get me killed?
DATS FOWR NAWT
TEACHING ME HOW
TWO TIE MY SHOES,
YOU FUCKING PLOOPY.
I'M ONWEE
THWEE, BUBBY!
HEWP ME TIE MY
GAWDDAYUM
SHOES.
So I punted that little shit into the wall..
I should have paid more attention to Miom though, because
she actually stuck by her word for once. She managed to
shoot me in both legs and break i
my.
fucking kneecaps.
11

Brother

Mal is from alabama

Butt

A screenshot of a text message conversation. The first message reads "Can you rate my butt pics?" The next two messages from the other party are "yes" and "Send." The first person responds with "Ok I'll send later." The other party responds with "okayyyy" and "I'm so excited I'm literally shaking."

Kitten

so cute

A small kitten is lying on its back with eyes closed and paws up. It has a white belly with tabby stripes on its head, ears, and paws. The kitten is lying on what appears to be a person's lap wearing blue jeans.

Gun

Guns

A meme with two men standing next to a car. The man on the left is presenting an AK-47 with a caption above it saying, "Slaps AK-47". The lower caption says, "This gun can shoot up so many schools". The face of the man on the left is covered by a US flag.

Wolf

The image shows two wolves with odd expressions. The text reads: "Inside me, there are two wolves. One is retarded, and so is the other."

Kitten

its a bunny syke im joking its a kitten so adorable

A white kitten with big eyes wears a white hat with bunny ears.

Century

I love this comic run so much

The comic shows Spider-Man and Deadpool looking at each other with confusion. In the second panel, a fiery horse carriage drives by. In the last panel, they discuss the 19th-century Ghost Rider and his potential involvement in the wrong Civil War. The text in the speech bubbles says: NEIGH! Did you just see that? 19th Century Ghost Rider? Yup. Oh man, do you think he's showing up to fight in the wrong civil war? Let's hope he fights for the North, otherwise he's not gonna like taking orders from a black Captain America.

Halloween

The image shows two scenes of the same bathtub. In the first scene, a person is relaxing in the tub, saying, "I am so relaxed." In the second scene, a second person has appeared in the tub, wearing a witch hat, and says, "Surprise!" The first person is clearly shocked and asks, "Why is this happening?"

Shrek

A cartoon illustration shows Shrek, a green, ogre-like character, wearing a wedding dress adorned with insect patterns and a purple suit, holding a cactus bouquet. He stands next to a crocodile dressed in a patterned robe, holding a book, appearing to officiate a wedding. The text below reads: "Shrek decided to marry whatever this thing is. No priest would officiate because God hated Shrek for being alive, so they used a crocodile."

Family

It’s so cold make it stop

A cartoon image of Squidward Tentacles from Spongebob Squarepants lying in bed, wide awake with a distressed, almost horrified expression, not peacefully sleeping. A small teddy bear is tucked in next to him. The text overlaid on the image reads: "How I sleep at night after killing the evil skin walkers who kept pretending to be my family:"

Deer

A screenshot of a 4chan post on a light green background. On the left, there is a small image of a brown deer standing in a forest, looking towards the right. Below the deer image, it says "34 KB JPG". To the right of the deer image, and continuing below it, is a block of text describing a disturbing hunting experience where the author and their grandfather witnessed a deer repeatedly slam its head into a rock until its skull shattered, then stood upright and walked into a river to die, leaving both the author and their grandfather traumatized.

Group

The image shows a cartoon representing different national teams as balls with their respective flags, each in their group for the EURO 2024. Each "countryball" expresses a different sentiment or makes a joke related to their football reputation or chances in the tournament. The text across the image shows dialog and commentary for each country.

Online comment

A screenshot of a dark-themed YouTube comment section. The main content is a lengthy comment from a user named "IvanLubin" which starts with "IQ?" and discusses the high IQ supposedly needed to understand Playboi Carti's music, referencing theoretical physics, nihilism, and Russian literature. It calls those who dislike Carti "idiots." The comment then shifts to praising Kanye West's album "DONDA" as a "cultural reset," followed by a comparison of choosing "Dinner with Jay Z" over $500,000 for financial success. The comment abruptly ends with a bizarre, explicit, and disturbing fantasy about wanting to have a baby with "Travis," describing the birth process in graphic detail. A red circle highlights the last few lines of the comment, which detail the desire to have a baby.

Platypus

An image of a platypus in its natural habitat. Text above the animal reads "They said I could be anything" and text below it reads "so I became everything."

Ball

A large, colorful beach ball, with a man standing next to it. The text below the image reads: "A fun way to ruin a weekend and blow 100 bucks. We took this ball to the beach and after close to 2 hours to pump it up, we pushed it around for about 10 fun filled minutes. That was when the wind picked it up and sent it huddling down the beach at about 40 knots. It destroyed everything in its path. Children screamed in terror at the giant inflatable monster that crushed their sand castles. Grown men were knocked down trying to save their families. The faster we chased it, the faster it rolled. It was like it was mocking us. Eventually, we had to stop running after it because its path of injury and destruction was going to cost us a fortune in legal fees. Rumor has it that it can still be seen stalking innocent families on the Florida panhandle. We lost it in South Carolina, so there is something to be said about its durability."

Kid

A man with glasses and a beard looks confused in front of a black background. At the bottom of the image it says: "I don't understand why kids scream when I touch them" Next to it, it says Mikes Meme Menagerie. To the right, is a list of other videos with titles like: "Watch me blow up the world Imao", "7 dead children in my backyard", and "Is he still screaming?".

Life

A man wearing a white hard hat and sunglasses sits on a couch in front of a muted background. Text above and below the man provide context: "ADHDers that take on life without medication:" above and "Well, first of all, with caffeine and anger, all things are possible, so jot that down" below.

Record

The image shows the album cover for Nas's "Ether" with the text overlay "Gay-Z and Cock-a-Fella Records". Below is a Twitter post that says, "So far. Kendrick said it's big me. Cole said sorry. And Drake said Kendrick got small feet. These the 'GOATS'. Light man."

Hip-hop

The image is a cartoon-style drawing featuring four characters. At the top, Eminem is depicted with spiky black hair and a serious expression, labeled with "Eminem" above his head. Below him and slightly to the left, Drake is drawn as a cartoon character with a straw hat, labeled as "Drake". Next to Drake is J Cole, also drawn as a cartoon with spiky hair, labeled as "J Cole". On the far right of the bottom, Kendrick is shown as a cartoon character with a headband, labeled as "Kendrick". They are all set against a green background with some trees.

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