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    Markgeraldnasol

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    I encountered a milf at a bar last night although she is 57 years old, she is still very charming and sexy

    we were drinking, chatting, laughing, and having a good time

    then, she asked me flirtatiously

    "have you ever tried a mother-daughter threesome before?"

    I said, "Nope, not yet".

    She drank a little more, and said, "well, darling, tonight is your lucky night."

    So she took me to her place.

    She took out her keys

    opens her door

    turn on the light

    and she yells towards upstairs

    "Mom, are you still awake?”

    An old man gets the call from the IRS The man on the phone says, “we’ve noticed large sums of money coming in and going out of your account constantly and we gotta get this straight. Come in tomorrow and we’ll have a chat about this.” The old man thinks for a while and then decides he better get his lawyer to come with him.

    The next day the old man and his lawyer show up to the IRS office and the man there says,”So we’ve noticed these large sums of money entering and leaving your account nonstop. Can you explain this?” The man replies,”Well, I will bet on pretty much anything. Like this! I bet you 10,000 I can bite my own eye.” The agent takes the bet, and the man takes out his glass eye and bites it. He then says,”Wait. I’ll give you a chance to earn your money back, and more! I bet you 20,000 I can bite my other eye.” The agent thinks a minute and realizing the man isn’t blind, takes the bet. The old man takes out his false teeth and bites his other eye. He then says,”alright last chance. I bet you 50,000 i can stand on this side of your office and pee into that wastebasket on the opposite side without getting a drop anywhere in between.” The agent thinks real hard but decides it’s impossible so takes the bet. The man unzips his pants and pees all over the IRS agents desk. The agent jumps up and down and says, “haha! I got you now!” But the mans lawyer goes pale in the face, sinks his head in his hands and says,”He bet me 100,000 on the way over here that he could piss all over your desk and you’d just love it!”

    Guy starts chatting to pretty woman at a party Seeing that she didn't back off he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. That's a nice name," he said warming up the conversation,

    "Who named you, your mother?"

    "No, I named myself, she answered.

    "Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?"

    "Because I like cars, and I like men," she said looking directly into his eyes. "So what's your name?" she asked.

    ‘BJ Titsngolf’

    Two Canadians die and end up in Hell. Satan decides to pay them a visit, so he walks into their room and sees them talking and laughing. Confused, he asks them why they're happy. They tell him, "Well, we're so sick of the cold where we're from, and this place is nice and toasty."

    Satan, annoyed, storms away and goes to Hell's boiler room, where he turns up the temperature.

    He goes back to the Canadians' room, along the way being begged by all sorts of people to put the heating back down. He enters the room to see the Canadians having a barbecue. Furiously, he asks them what they're doing.

    "Well, we can't pass up this wonderful weather without getting out the barbecue!"

    Satan realizes he's been doing the wrong thing. He goes to the boiler room and turns it down until it's at a colder temperature than ever seen on earth.

    He knows he's won now, so he goes back to the Canadians' room, only to see them jumping up and down in excitement.

    He shouts at them in fury, "WHY ARE YOU STILL HAPPY?!?!?!"

    They look at him and shout at the same time, "Hell froze over! That means the Leafs won!"

    How can you tell a Pokémon likes baseball? Every night he turns into a gol-bat.

    Comment 👍 if you like this joke!